New term, new beginning

I was always a crammer when it came to studying. Like I would wait and wait until the very last moment and then something in me would snap and I would know: SHIT, it’s time to focus. And then I did. I would get into the zone and get the work done. I’m a bit like that with any deadline really, work especially. I can get a brief a long way out and I think that I’ll get that done early when I have the time and not rush and the proceed to ignore that until: SHIT, it’s time to focus.

Well, I have kind of been like all year. I spend moments where I try and exercise, and eat better, except I do for a week and then just get back into that comfort zone. I’ve done that maybe 2 or 3 times already this year and then something happens: the kids got whooping cough, the weather got cold, the baby did something, but you know what? It’s 4th term. The end of the year is in sight: SHIT, it’s time to focus.

I’ve been feeling particularly shit these past few months. An endless winter and the realisation that I have a toddler on my hands and that I am not really great at parenting toddlers has seen me slip into patterns of bad exercise and eating. As in, none and lots of it. And I “know” that I am not massive or hugely overweight, but I do know that I’m about 10 kilos over where I should be. And that every piece of clothing is clingy and tight and uncomfortable. But more than all that…I feel bad in my head. I’m tired, irritable, snappy and just feeling shit about everything because I am feeling shit about me. Remember this post I wrote at the start of the year about having one for the pot? Well it’s October 2016 and my pot is pretty dry. All those start of the year best intentions? Well they were lost in February and life got in the way.

But not anymore. Something in me has snapped, and you might be feeling the same way too. I made a chart for Harper on the weekend, you know, the 786th chart. Because nothing says insanity like doing something again and again and expecting a different result.

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Anyone, enough of the putting shit on myself. A chart! And there are 11 weeks until Christmas. 77 days! And it’s not too late to make a difference to the back end of this year and go into the Christmas break with a bit of sanity, clothes that fit and a strong body that can swim with the kids and run around over the summer. So let’s all say this together: SHIT, it’s time to focus.

I am focused. And I am writing this so I am accountable to someone other than myself (who I am expert at lying and making excuses to/for). I am going to make sure that there are 5 stickers on my chart every week that show that I did some kind of exercise 5 times in a week.

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It might just be my quick 35 minute walk to the highway and back (about 4kms) it might be a bit longer. It may even be a cheeky session at the gym where I have not been sighted since I got pregnant with Maggie, whatever it is, there will be 5 of them. That’s my promise.

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And I’m going to watch what I eat, I love food too much to go hard on this, but I really am going to focus on portion control and cutting back on my beloved carbs. Think lots of salads and greens and water. I will not partake in a green smoothie though, you can’t make me.

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But more than that there HAS to be some time for me. I want to feel good about myself again. Beth the person, not the Mum of three, or the one that needs to work. I want to make an effort wearing the clothes I have rather than chucking on whatever. I want to go to the movies, I want to go out for drinks with the girls. I want to get my nails done. You know, that kind of small stuff that does make you feel better that you NEVER do.

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And then come the end of term 4 and the start of holidays? I can wear clothes comfortably and not dread getting into a pair of swimmers. I can be in a good head space and I can be ready to tackle 2017 without having to make new promises to myself that I will just give up on.

So that’s me, starting today. Feel free to join me too if you want. These are small changes, nothing huge or life changing and of course there will be slips up along the way. But I just want to be in mid December with jeans that don’t cut my guts off, feeling better about ME. And basically I want to go into the dilly season at a good fighting weight so I can give it a good nudge over the holidays. Never said I was sane. There’s still time in this year, there has to be still time for me.

Anyone else ready for some small changes?
Sick of pretending your jeans fit?
Should we have a hashtag? #notafatmoleforchristmas?

Comments

  1. Very positive outlook you have there! I totally hear what you are saying. I keep telling myself that as soon as the warm weather gets here, I’ll just eats salads every day and amazingly get skinny in time for me to eat and drink as much as I like at Christmas. Look forward to hearing about the exercise and perhaps get some motivation for myself! Thanks in advance ?

  2. Danielle Barnes says:

    ha! love the hashtag! Me too….I keep promising I am going to start exercising, I manage to walk a couple of times but nothing is consistent….I need it to be consistent.

  3. Rachael H says:

    Beth!!!!!! I could have written every word of that myself!!!! It’s exactly how I feel and am right now. I’m giving it a go too. Come on 4th term, let’s do this before the turkey hits the table.

  4. Gosh I need to take a leaf out of your book – the getting active thing and not eating ALL the carbs just because I can! I’m joining you on this!

  5. Don’t need to lose weight, dodgy heart/lungs means I burn a bazillion calories trying to breathe. I do however need to find something for my wardrobe that is not jeans & a tshirt. I need a change & some colour, that is my thing to work on. I will start working on it just as soon as I get out of the corner I just crawled into to sob quietly about it only being 11 weeks until Christmas …… where did my year go ??!!

    • It’s crazy. Nikki is great at sorting this stuff out – I really need to grow through all my stuff and actually SEE what I have and then WEAR it. Instead of the top 2 items in each drawer!

  6. Josephine says:

    (Hand goes up). Yep, been feeling exactly the same way the last few months. Also going to give better habits a red-hot go between now and Christmas. May the force be with you!

  7. Love your posts Beth. Your honesty, the fact you say things I think but don’t say to anyone else! You are so real!
    Exercise is something I love, making time for me is something I am hopeless at! There is always someone who needs something more then I think I do! Until last night! Last night I snapped! Had spent since Friday preparing and baking for my 9 year old’s birthday party but that was still not enough. They wanted friends over for dinner after the party! I said no, with reasonable reasons – no food prepared, new school term starting tomorrow etc. Came home, washed up all the party stuff, put on my shoes and went walking. Without the dog! Walking just for me! So I get it! I’ll play along. 15 minutes for me a day! Best get it in now before snacks before swim squad! Let’s fill the pots!

  8. Jill Unsworth says:

    Oh Beth yes, thank you ! I’m loving #notafatmoleforchristmas bring it on ?

  9. See all I saw was blah blah blah SHOES – I need those shoes.

    (I didn’t really, and I think a chart for you that the kids see is actually very effective on their behaviour too)

    And holy shit, 11 weeks. What the???

  10. #notafatmoleforchristmas is my kind of fitspo. I’m in.

  11. I absolutely love that hashtag (will use) and we are so in a similar place right now! I just declared my Term 4 healthy living intentions on my blog yesterday! We got this! xx

  12. Ah, one step ahead of you here with the food thing. Had a bit of a moment at the end of April when I realised WeightGain 2016 had to end, and somehow, down the internet rabbit hole, I came across Dr Michael Moseley’s 8 Week Blood Sugar Diet. Went out the next day and got the book, read it and started the following. It bloody works. Did a round before we went overseas in June, came back and got back on the wagon. Nearly finished a 12 week round, not as focussed but the weight has still been dripping off slowly.
    Will join you on the fitness side of things – did my walk this morning with the dog in tow! So #notafatmollforchristmas!!

  13. I hear you!!!!
    One very important question though- WHERE did you get those gorgeous yellow sandals???

  14. I’m in!

  15. Hi Beth,
    I know how you feel. I felt like a fatty this morning and went for a run and ate really well all day.
    Then got home and ate sourdough and dip and some chips. Plus some watermelon.
    I am so bad.!!!I feel really yucky now. But i guess tomorrow is a new day.
    I can’t control the “after school snacking” and I think that happens when the kids are at home, after being at school and all is chaos.
    Another thing I should just try is probably to get dinner on earlier and not at 8pm. If i have dinner done at 6pm then I won’t be snacking right? I know you guys eat dinner early. Does that help in your neck of the woods?
    Have a great night and keep at it!

    • It does for me…we eat SUPER early around 5/5.30 and although I may get hungry around 9 I really stay away from it and know that it’s all processed by the time I go to bed at night. Good luck!

  16. I’m in! Not sure I won’t still be a fat mike at Christmas but I’ll be slightly less fat by Christmas ? Going home to make chart NOW

  17. Oh dear God I’m feeling this post today. #imwithher

  18. I made a small change last January. Being retired and living in a warm climate upped my food intake and downed my metabolism, respectively. So when half our street joined the local healthy eating plan with weekly weigh-ins and inspirational meetings, I did too. That was almost 40 pounds ago! And I can’t even exercise too much due to a pinched nerve in my back. But I feel great, and I’ve found a couple of web sites (don’t know if I’m allowed to post them here) that develop healthy recipes the whole family enjoys. Since I love to cook, that has been the lifesaver for me. It’s fun to try new recipes, and it keeps me from getting bored with the food.

    I don’t know why it worked this time; three other times I have given up after 5 lbs. But there are two people left of the originals from our street, and I’m one of them. I think I’ll be able to do the maintenance part of this for life, because it just feels so good. What also feels good is dragging clothes out of the back of my closet that now fit. Good luck, Beth!

  19. I’m in – feeling exactly the same way. I want to wear a new dress on Christmas day – hell, or even fit into an old one! – and not cringe when I see any photos of myself!

  20. Yep… I’m in.

  21. I’m going to give it a go with you Beth – I don’t really know what a hashtag is but I’d love to be notsuchafatmoleforchristmas! One day in and so far so good. My biggest problem (other than no jeans that fit) is that it comes to Friday night and I think thank god that week’s over and scoff too much prosecco/red wine/both and whatever food I can get my hands on. I promise myself I won’t do it again then it comes to Friday and I think….you get the picture!

    • Well that’s me too obvs BUT! If we only do that 2 days a week and are good the other days than it STILL has to count for something right? I look forward to cheering you on if I see you in he street!

  22. Great plan!!! It is amazing what a difference a few small positives changes can make over time! You deserve to feel good about yourself!

  23. count me in.

    Love the carbs but sadly they don’t love me back. x

  24. Drinking a green smoothie as I read your post Beth. I even Instagram storied it. I need to jump in on this too. x

  25. So ready to start putting my life back together and to feel “normal” again. The last three years have just been shit shit shit. I’ve let to many things take over my life and not in a good way. I’ve put on so much weight and been so stressed that I hardly recognise myself. I’ll never be where I want to be by this Christmas, so my goal is to start right now and be the real me by next Christmas. Fingers crossed and thanks for the kick up the bum xx

    • Start at the beginning! You’ve got this – hope you can stick it out – I’m sure once you start to feel better it will be easy to keep going. Good luck!!!

  26. Absolfreakinglutely! Took myself off to the naturopath yesterday for a bit of a kick up the arse (not going to let my crazy lady hormones beat me) and yes, yes, yes – I’m in with you! And totes a hashtag!

  27. good luck beth! … you look ok to me hun!
    incidental excersize … I can’t even spell the b word!!! … running around after that cute toddler and reduced carbs, it will be a doddle!
    but I need those shoes please!
    much love m:)X

  28. Hi Beth I hear you! Surely this year has been one of the quickest on record or is it just me? I’m not a big promo girl but a month ago I joined up with an online program and it’s just clicked. Really good fresh food that everyone eats (miracle!) 28 mins of exercise a day. I’m sleeping better, skin’s improved, waist and gut shrinking. Feels so good to be in control of myself again. Go for it – and then bring on summer!

  29. Like I said to you on Insta yesterday, pretty sure our healthy selves piss off together. I’m dragging healthy Reannon back whether she ( or unhealthy Reannon) likes it or not! I’ve given myself 10 weeks to clean up my act, setting small goals each week & trying to not be too hard on myself if I slip up. I don’t want to give up the things I love completely, I just want to feel in control.

  30. OMG! I could have written this post. Just had a big change-of-decade birthday and decided I am so over the slow endless creep of kilos. The clothes that don’t fit. And then I don’t care, don’t get my hair done, just throw on what I have (getting more ‘loose fitting’ styles than ever). I’ve just started making changes in the last 2 weeks – and already I feel so much better. 1.5kg down and have incorporated exercise I really like into my life. So that meant quitting my gym membership (gulp! a big step after decades of gym going) and getting back on my bike. Cycling – so much fun! Like being a kid again. But more than anything it’s about making the time to do it. Scheduling in the time was the big behavioural change. Good luck! I’m doing it too. Great post.

    • That’s such a good idea! Do things you love to do – makes it SO much easier to find the motivation. Well done and good luck keeping it all up!

  31. Do it! You’ll never regret it! My third turns 2 in November and in June I felt the EXACT same as you. Chunky, slothy, and over it! Cut back on carbs and drinking calories, got myself to the gym, drank more water, and now….30 lbs down and feeling like I did pre-children (save some loose skin and stretch marks.)
    Good luck to you!

  32. A few weeks ago, I had a similar epiphany, I was running around doing everything for everyone else and nothing for myself and in doing so was no good to no one.
    So I’ve been eating better (lost 6kg so far), dressing better, putting make up on everyday, taking time out for me, focusing on the things that make me happy. Faking it until I make it.
    I’ve made a couple of crazy steps jobs wise, which look like they might actually come off.
    So here’s to both of us! Xx

  33. i’m hearing you sister. I am in. I am with you on the carbs… I just can’t do them, they bloat me so badly I look 17 months pregnant and feel like shit. Have been trotting out a yummy lunch – a BLT of sorts.. lettuce cup with fried bacon/onion (in butter and garlic), top with tomato, avocado, feta and….. peanuts! Oh dear lord it is good – and those nuts give it a bit of crunch and the feta… no words. I am in town for a school week – always bring my joggers and never wear them.. but his morning I am up and at it (because I didn’t have my usual 7,362 wines with my friends last night, only 3) blog post done and am about to go for a jog! We can do this Betharoonie and we will feel so much better.

  34. This is just what I need! Yeah I could lose a few kgs but have been working on that recently and already down a few but the old time to exercise is desperately needed in my life for my mental health. I’ve been feeling horrible, tired and lacking my usual buzz for life over the past 5 weeks so think this could be just the thing to help me out of that black hole. I’m in!

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