Preggo Files #15

Kate and Wills have been out and about at her very last social engagement before her baby comes. She is totally high fiving the fact that she is on maternity leave now! My lord the woman knows how to hold a clutch purse to best show off her jewels does she not?! Time to get those yoga pants on Kate and chill out. Perhaps a little nursery prep? Washing baby clothes in Lux soap flakes? Catch up on the latest season of Real Housewives of Beverley Hills?


It’s been a busy week or so in preggo land, albeit a very emotional one. Oh the tears! I suspect had I not been pregnant I would still be as emo given the death of a mate, a wedding anniversary, a visit to a sick relative interstate, a child’s first public speaking speech, the end of term one coming to a close, the impending work of the Easter Market ahead of us but sheesh, the tears that have flowed! I’m hormonal, I cry at the slightest touching song on the TV or radio or supermarket for that fact, it’s been a little full on. Lucky for me I have had these guys close by.


What we are looking at here are BRIOCHE HOT CROSS BUNS WITH A CUSTARD CROSS from Gumnut Patisserie.


Holy shit is right is Kate. I do hope you are partaking in some of them over the festive period dear girl, you could do with some. Just make sure you use Lurpak with them, apply so thick you can see teeth marks and you will be good to go. You’re welcome!

I attended my Calm Birth workshop thing over the weekend and while I think it deserves it’s very own post, and I’m not quite ready to do justice to it which maybe have to be after the fact when I actually have that babe outside of my uterus, I will say it was an amazingly positive experience for both Rob and I. I’ve got so much to say on it, and so much stuff to still process from it, and when I’m through that I will share a bit with you. I share a couple of observations with you though.


First time parents on a weekend away in the Highlands relish the time away and company with their partners. Third time parents? Well, we just were happy to sit in an empty quiet room during lunch without the sound of an 8 or 5 year old nearby. SO quiet! SO good.

I’m almost certain everyone thought I was completely crackers with the amount of crying I did. Meditation? Oh, don’t mind me while I sob away. Playing a song about a baby or watching a video on a birth? TEARS. Sharing stories about something special? Pass me the tissues already. There is all this stuff inside of me, shifting, getting ready to pack up and move away, stuff about my last 2 births, about all my fears and anxieties, all this motherhood stuff that is a really big part of me, and it’s shifting and it’s emotional and exhausting and really exciting and wonderful that I can put it behind me. This baby might be the greatest teacher I’ll ever have, and they are not even here yet. Huh.

Also, I need to get a leotard for birth.


Don’t those pictures remind of you of the illustrations in The Joy Of Sex? MY parents had that book and when we were kids we would sneak in and look at the pictures of that man with the BEARD and his wife and giggle and blush and generally do and say inappropriate things about it. Eeeeeeew! Imagine your parents having sex!

You know that’s totally us now right? Eeeeew!

Someone this week alerted me to the fact that this thing exists. A baby shusher.


Holy shit I am out of the loop with this baby business. A thing that shushes your baby…simulating the sound of blood flow inside? I think the thing I had first time around was a CD that had white noise sounds on it. I think if I heard it again it would be like a trigger for post traumatic stress of being alone with a newborn baby and having NO idea what to do with it.  I wonder if this baby will find the sounds of Spongebob and it’s siblings fighting soothing?

Meanwhile Asher and her little baby boy Valentino are on the cover of Who this week. Asher is looking extraordinary well and glowing with superior cheekbones and look at the babyyyyyyyy! Adorable, the two of you!


And out Cate has a new baby girl! Edith! All these precious babies…they are everywhere!


I’m enjoying the old school names too I must admit. I saw this post on Vintage names making a comeback…adorable!

Still taking photos of where I park my car, airport car park was particularly difficult. I made sure I took a photo of each lift I went into and what the level was.


Craving: kale and hot cross buns. A ying to my yang I guess. I fear for my weigh in next week at my ob post Easter. It’s not going to be pretty, and I am OK with that. I hope she feels the same.

Drinking: Endless cups of tea. Endless because I never seem to finish one properly and because it’s getting a little cooler.

Dreaming: What’s that? This is me…in the little house with the light on.


Harps is doing better in bed, but I still get the pitter patter of feet wandering in around 5 times per night. It takes all of about 45 seconds to walk her back, pull up the covers and give her a kiss and reassuring whisper, but it’s still 45 seconds of interruption of sleep. Sometimes if I’m extra unlucky I actually wake up and start thinking about, you know, EVERYTHING. Then go back to sleep to be woken 15 minutes later. Sheesh.

Worrying: You name it. Go on, name something! Bet I am thinking about it. Why that pilot killed all those poor innocent people? Why people just drop dead and die? Will I ever get a full nights sleep again? What we will do in the school holidays? What I’ll cook for dinner next Tuesday. And slowly letting it allllllllllllllll goooooooo. What good will worrying do anyway? None! That’s what!

I am so excited about the break we have coming up later this week. Easter! My favourite holiday of all, family visitors, fires, sitting around and playing with baby Archie, eating Easter eggs and hot cross buns and perhaps even a few days away to the farm. Time to sleep in, not make school lunches, go to movies, stay in Pyjamas….it couldn’t be a better time for a break.

So, cheers to you friends with my old favourite, affectionately known as Piney. Have had all kinds of wonderful suggestions about what Piney works with – some crushed ice, some coconut water, oh Piney, you make me so happy! I’ll be sure to pack you into the hospital bag.


And Kate, so long my friend. Until we see you leaving that hospital with your newest little one…will we have to wait until then? I wish you good luck. Remember to breathe. You can do it. We can both do it!


Have you ever heard of a baby shusher?
Remember the Joy of sex? (the book that is, not the actual JOY of sex, I’m sure you can all remember that!) And those illustrations!
Anything keeping you up at night too?


  1. I adore Easter also, and school holidays. Had to laugh at the leotard comment. I hope you get some better sleep soon and that Harper sleeps soundly before baby arrives. So much to think about all the time, I’m horrified about that plane, the passenger screaming because the pilot was locked out and trying to bash door down. I’m glad they’ve instantly made a two pilot in cockpit rule. Rest up and enjoy those hot cross buns.

  2. Sam Leader says

    The midwife at our antenatal class suggested Johnno rub me on the back with a tennis ball during contractions. He gave it a go while I was sucking on the gas for all I was worth, and I only pulled the mouthpiece out for long enough to growl “getyourfuckinghandsoffme” before sucking on it again. Birth two he made the mistake of telling me to man up, although I was complaining A LOT. Anecdotes aside, I’m so glad I was he was there. So excited for you x

  3. Gosh I’d love to know how Kate will be spending her maternity leave… I am totally going with trash tv.

    And I just love the names Vera and Mae. I had a great Aunty Vera, or Aunty V as we called her. She was so artisitic and creative and I wanted to be just like her. Sadly, I’m not. And Mae was right up there on my girls list the first time round until I remembered bubs was actually due in Mae and it just felt odd.

  4. I’m such a fan of these posts Beth!
    And just quietly, I’ve been doing my fair share of crying too lately, and I’m not even preggo!! Life changes and we have to roll with it, huh?
    I hope your Easter break is decadent for body AND soul.

  5. I think I’ve said on every preggo post how much I love them but I really do. They seem so real & so you & I now that’s dumb because this blog is real & full of you but I don’t know, these post just really make me smile & want to give you a hug. Maybe it’s because I was you this exact time last year, and the year before ( for he love of God ! Do not use breastfeeding as contraception! I was a delusional fool!), who knows why I adore these post so much but I do!

  6. Have you seen those BabyZoo night lights? I’ve ordered one for my toddler today, hoping that it helps with night time wake up. They can carry it, it doesn’t get hot and during the night they can turn it back on it they need to. Here’s where I ordered mine from. they are very cute little turtles.

  7. these files will be gorgeous for you to look back on beth!
    yeh those hormones are responsible for so much emotional turmoil!
    great that you are doing those classes!
    even in my day I went to them! all good! love m:)X

  8. OMG, I think I’d be willing to spend Easter weekend on the toilet for just one bite of that hot cross bun x

  9. I must have those hot cross buns….

  10. “shifting, getting ready to pack up and move away” – have I read that incorrectly – are you leaving the highlands?

  11. Great post! I really like the last pic of Kate waving good bye. You can imagine her thinking “You can all fuck off now please”

  12. Oh. My. Goodness. When I think of all the nights I have stood beside bassinets/cots shushing shushing shushing till my lips were numb…. I’m almost tempted to get myself a Baby Shusher just for the hell of it!

    You’re almost there Beth, you’re doing great 🙂 xo

  13. Lisa Mckenzie says

    No never heard of a baby shusher do they make adult children or husband ones?
    I love all the new babies that are being born ,so beautiful I am glad you’re going to your calm birth classes it will help I think or I hope it will,I wish you a speedy,safe and easy labour with this baby Beth you deserve it! Do NOT buy a leotard sweets you won’t need it

  14. So bloody funny Beth. Comfort and efficiency, I don’t remember either of these things from the second stages of labour…just saying. I love the look of those hot cross buns, oh my lord. x

  15. Beth I love these posts so hard. Now I’m torn between dying to see the new Baby Mac and never wanting the Preggo Files to end. It’s such a conundrum! And if you do get a leotard, make sure it’s got poppers or something because otherwise how will you get that baby out? As for the worrying, it’s keeping my brain-a-busy too. Especially that plane. It makes my heart hurt. I’ve been watching a lot of Frozen Sing-a-Long (I’m the only kid in the house) and trying to take a leaf out of Elsa’s book. Those Hot Cross Buns look epic – here’s to an eggcellent Easter! x

  16. mrshanksy says

    Hahahaha – “I wonder if this baby will find the sounds of Spongebob and it’s siblings fighting soothing?” My favourite line of all time…

  17. Baby shusher…WTF??
    Says it all, we are completely losing it as a race!
    Oh my, the Joy of Sex man. He looked like such a man, didn’t he.
    It just didn’t make sex look enjoyable I thought, I mean they didn’t really look that happy, did they? Perhaps he just wasn’t my type…I was in to Luke Skywalker back then.

  18. I had sleeping stuff with my ‘one’ child. Only just survived, so much admiration for you. Perfectly understandable if they have health issues that have woken them up in the past. On reflection I wish we had just gone with the flow and made nothing of it, because son said recently we made him anxious about not sleeping by focusing on it. Hmm. Anyway the thing that worked best was buying a giant stuffed lion for him to sleep with — same size as him.

  19. oh I so wish I hadn’t seen those custard hot cross buns. I eat enough of the regular kind without them getting all next level on me! PS I too am “just Beth” and strongly identified with your About Me blurb. I get Bev , Beck and – annoyingly – Ruth about twice a week.

  20. A baby shusher! How awesome is that! For my first bub I had the white noise on CD on repeat, and for my 2nd bub we’d progressed to the iPhone and some incredible free baby app that has 30 odd noises you can choose from. You can even layer the sounds too – my personal favourite was the sound of the beach with humming…but you could choose the vaccume cleaner with dogs barking and wind chimes clanging if that did the trick! Worked a treat until you forget the phone’s not on silent and it rings right next to your baby’s head. Bugger!!
    This time last year I was in your shoes and now my baby is 11 months old and I’m planning her first birthday party and honestly wondering where that year has gone. Your preggo files are so hilarious. I wonder what it will be once bub has arrived? The Post Partum files??!

  21. I want that baby shusher so I can shush my brain! What’s keeping me up at night, you ask!?
    Next week I return to my hometown over the ditch so my siblings and I can sort and divide our parents estate. My Mum passed away recently whilst I was visiting her on holiday. So, what’s keeping me awake at 12.45 am tonight is, HOW to equitably distribute a 60 year old, 40 pc dinner set, who gets the 60 yr old cutlery set, Mums favourite chopping board, the thousands of family slides and pics,furniture, jewellery, heirlooms, linen etc etc and how to do all this in 3 days and to still be friends afterwards!! My head hurts, my heart hurts and now I’m going to get up and have another cup of tea!! Only one problem. I really fucking NEED one of those hot cross buns!

  22. Such wisdom!
    “This baby might be the greatest teacher I’ll ever have, and they are not even here yet.”

    I love the Baby Shusher, I might buy one for Nick this Easter 😉

  23. Don’t worry, you won’t need the Shoosher – your baby will be able to sleep through anything with 2 siblings and ABC in the background. I used to be the same – crying at absolutely anything on TV – even ads. Too funny. You are totally prepared for this baby because you have never really had a good nights sleep since having kids – with Harper waking you a gazillion times over the years, so the baby will be a piece of cake. Take care. xx

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