Nine and six and one

We had a bit of a shocker yesterday afternoon. Nothing unusual at the start of school holidays when kids are exhausted, tempers frayed, adjusting to life back at home with Mums and Dads and baby sisters there, too much time on devices, gorging after not being able to do it in the school term, it was the perfect storm for a shit storm and boy did we get one.

It took a long time for things to calm down, almost 2 hours in fact. There were consequences that we had to follow through on (man I hate a follow through not to mention how much the kids do) but it was necessary. There were tears and words, and ripped pictures and photos and did I mention tears?

It’s full on this parenting thing isn’t it? I’m finding it hard at the moment, each of the girls all wanting so many different things from me, juggling out the frustrations of a 1 year old against a nine year old who seems so frustrated but for completely different reasons (namely people telling her what to do is NOT OK SHE CAN DO WHAT SHE LIKES DON’T YOU KNOW?!) and then a 6 year old who feels much older than the little body she is in. Goodness.

But then there was a moment not long after the shit storm where the 1 year old was happy to sit and look at books for longer than 12 seconds. And then the 9 year old who was feeling deeply sorry for her behaviour went and read with the 1 year old without being asked to. And then the 6 year old joined in, because she can’t miss a thing. Ever. And it was nice. Really nice.

IMG_7943 IMG_7947 IMG_7956 IMG_7971 IMG_7978 IMG_7981 IMG_7982 IMG_7986 IMG_7998

You never know what’s ahead of you in this business do you? What problem is just around the corner? Which thing will sort itself out? Thank goodness for the quiet moments in between.

Where are you at?

One?
Six?
Nine?

I read this article about Nine last week that made me smile. Got your own 9 year old? Want a drink?

Comments

  1. I’m at:
    Four
    Five
    Seven
    and a 19-week bump!!
    Ask me in about 21 weeks how I am managing. May the force be with me!!!

  2. I am at 4,7 and 8. And ever since my 4 year old turned 4, he seems really grown up ( sob sob ) and for the very tiny moment they play really good together. But doesn’t it go in cycles?!? Never ending changing cycles of trying to figure it out haha! Don’t think I ever will, but it is a whole lot of fun trying ?

  3. I feel your pain of the juggle Beth. We’re at ten, fourteen and seventeen. So much angst. Just so much pulling here and there. How I’d just love to turn back the hands of time for a bit!

  4. I’m at 7 and 12 x 2. The seven year old is easy, the almost teens on the other hand.. ?

  5. Kim Otero says:

    6
    12 (pre teen girl)
    21
    I love wine……alot

  6. 5 and 11. We seem to be in a sweet spot. My eldest has always been a dream and after a rocky start the 5 year old is becoming more socially acceptable. Following through on consequences is something I have a 100% track record on. Good on you for standing firm.

  7. 5, 3 and 7 months. Hanging out for a full night’s sleep again one day.

  8. 12 year old boy who is a dream. 9 year old girl – need I say more…..

  9. Reannon says:

    16- learning to drive, girlfriend, year 11
    13- thinks he’s the same age as his brother, adjusting to high school
    3- apraxia, doesn’t sleep well, fights a shitload with his little sister,trying learning ALL the things
    2- does not sleep, the only girl amongst the boys, learning to talk, a force to be reckoned with.

    That’s the thing I’m learning the longer info this mothering gig, you REALLY have to suck in those good moments because in the blink of an eye everything can go to shit & kids are punching on or throwing tantrums or yelling or sulking or hormone-ing & it’s hard to not think ” well fuck you all! I’m doing my best! Stop being jerks!” But the shit storms always end & normalcy returns.

  10. Almost 15 year old girl (Year 9 absolutely sucks! ) and a almost 12 year old boy. They mainly hate each other. They fight about ear phones, phone chargers, looking at each other and just generally breathing. Alls good, it won’t last forever.

  11. Heidi D says:

    I just have a 13 year old now but many moons ago when she was one we had two boys in long term foster care with us so I had 1, 3 & 6. There were some days that made me wonder what ever possessed me to think 3 kids was a good idea. Then there were the moments when they would play or snuggle together that made it all worthwhile.

  12. 7, 5, 3 & 3 months and it’s day 1 of the school holidays…
    not having to do school runs, preschool runs, activities or take my PJ’s off makes it worth it 😉

  13. I’m at 14, 12 & 11 and within the next 3 months it will become 15, 13 & 12. It is a hormone shitstorm in my neck of the woods. I’m actually considering taking doors off hinges to prevent the parental shit storm that will occur when it eventually falls off from the slamming ? Someone once said “Have yours kids close together, it will be worth it when they are older.” I hope I live to see the day, cause we ain’t there yet. Luckily they all love me, it’s each other they have issues with.

    • Deb… This made me laugh!! The door slamming is ramping up in our (almost) 11 & 13 house and the first break happened yesterday… And yes, this parent lost her shit big time!!!! I hadn’t considered actually removing the doors as a preemptive measure. You’re onto something there…. Good luck!

  14. 8, 6, 4 – second week of school holidays and today was TOUGH!

  15. 30
    28
    27
    26
    …………..it NEVER gets better!!!

  16. Even today I was thinking about your 90 minute tantrum. 90….so long.

    I have a 5 year old which is weird because it feels he was just born.

    Keep the Faith.

  17. Amanda G. says:

    We are at 11 and 7. Boys. The 11 year old has been pushing out on his boundaries for a while now, we give him a bit and he takes a mile. So you have to rein it in and start again. The backchat, the wanting social media, (You Tube, Instagram) we are holding off at this stage, he may be 11 but is a young 11. He’s a Gemini and boy, do we get twins with this one. The 7 year old is loud and goes like an energiser bunny till bed time. Headstrong. Boy do we have some battles with him. He thinks he’s 11 as well. The arguments they have! But then they’ll sit down to watch the telly and be lying all over each other happy as clams.

  18. We are at 11, 6 (almost 7) and 1. All girls. Emotions run pretty high and low in this household but not often in between. When they do I savour every moment.

  19. Linda jenkins says:

    23 and 20 year old daughters both juggling study , work and life and our son – almost 18 nearly through year 12 . 5 adults under
    The one roof all doing their thing is another kind of challenge !

  20. I am at 20,22 & 24. Completely different scenarios than you all . Not easier or harder , just different .

  21. 11, 9 (dear god help me) and 6. 11 yo girl seems to think she is the boss, the 9 yo boy is not happy with her attitude ( oh, the irony). The 6 yo boy thinks he is 9 also.
    Thankfully I have been at work today and hubby has had to deal with them. Now I get to, ahem, enjoy their company for the next fortnight ….

  22. 19 girl -away at uni most the year. I miss her constantly and feel like my best friend is missing.
    Almost 11 boy – ASD 2nd week of the holidays here and I can feel the “keep him busy and engaged” momentum winding down. I’m having to dig deep in my bag of tricks
    The parenting challenges never go away they just change. You’ve just got to roll with them or they will eat you alive ?

  23. I’m at 20, 18, 11 and 7. I’m telling you that it will not get easier!! The 20 year old thinks she doesn’t have to work, the 18 year old is busting his hump to get into the Navy (he just needs to get his braces off for that to happen, but it’s taking too long for his liking) and Miss 11 and Miss 7 have jumped i. The car with my parents and gone on holiday. Hubby is laying on the couch (and has done for the last three weeks) as he had a bulging disc in his neck. He has another 4 weeks at least off work. I work at the local school, so I can’t even escape to work!!!

  24. 17, 8 & 3. I just keep reminding myself they are going to be beautiful adults, but the journey can suck at times.

  25. Gawd, I’ve done 9 three times now and boy, it’s a shocker! My three girls are 14, 12 and 10 now and as one of the previous commenters said, it’s a hormonal shitstorm around here. The one saving grace is that they are old enough now that I can hide in the garden and not worry that they will burn down the house or drown in the toilet while I do some deep breathing and positive affirmations.

  26. Thankyou for this lovely post. Made me smile at the thought of your little ones after the storm, and reminded me that my battles yesterday esp with Miss 8 are going to happen, and that’s ok. Mine are 12, 10, 8 and 5

  27. OMG I just read that article about 9. I’m at 7, 5 & 2. Is there no light at the end of this tunnel??? This is payback isn’t it for the brat that I was isn’t it???? This will be a great laugh for my mum. ?

  28. 17y, 15y, & 11 months. I will take that drink thanks, better make it a double!

  29. 4, 2 and 8 months pregnant. Can’t wait until I can use wine as a coping mechanism again! I can imagine 9 will be much more challenging emotionally, I think my 4 will be a terrible tween so watch this space!

  30. I’m At 8 & 12…turning teen in a few weeks! Two boys and boy they are arguing! My almost teen currently thinks he really doesn’t need to listen to anything I say…then does the sweetest thing and tells me he’s put a hot water bottle in my bed as is a tad chilly….master 8 is usually the crazy one but such a sweet boy with a beautiful heart. Both such different personalities and characters, and both my world x

  31. Carly jay says:

    I totally understand trying to share yourself between needs… I have one , two, eight, nine. The struggle is real. I just do the very best I can. I’m strick on the follow though, you have to be. Especially when there is little ones watching on , learning, wondering …. What they could get away with. Some days feel like total disasters.. So when they have a sweet ending I know it’s working.

  32. Yvonne Duke says:

    I’m at 14, 16, 17 and 22 …….!! Older 2 are boys, younger 2 girls. Don’t know which is worse….actually, I do….it’s the girls !!!!

  33. 7, 5 and 3 – so much easier now than it was in terms of physical work. No nappies, can dress themselves etc. Not quite into the next tween stage yet so enjoying the moment while I can after the years of sleeplessness and exhaustion 🙂 will always need wine!!

  34. Naomi J says:

    2 x 3 year olds plus an 18 month old.

    So cute when they are all playing nicely together… so not cute when all three are crying/fighting/ tantruming/falling over at the same time.

  35. Whitney Sigler says:

    Well I have news for you, no arguments or misunderstands but, with our
    30
    26
    24
    Oh my gosh they think “we don let have a life” now they are all grown and have families.
    We wen car shopping on Saturday and I receive 27 calls not counting the texting between our daughter and daughter In law. (Assuming we should be home and We should be having a family cookout) trying to figure out then what we should do. “Call some other friends” lol. I’m glad they live us lol but, leave us alone. PS. We did have a cookout “at Son’s” he cooked!!! We just showed us hungry! ❤️

  36. Follow through is the worst. I hate having to be the bad guy sometimes.
    I’m at nearly 1 and 3.
    And 3 sucks arse!!! I want my 2 year old back!!! The attitude!!! The meltdowns!!! The stubbornness!!
    Oy.
    Please tell me it gets better.

  37. Absolutely beautiful pics. No matter what- and I mean what as total, world ending melt downs- babies bring the absolute best out of anyone – shitty 9 year olds included.
    Mine are 10 months, 3 & 6 and I witness the above descriptions daily. ……
    Ohh no! What will happen when the eldest is 9 And the baby 3- no longer a baby and easily able to draw them into the lovable distraction!! Hmmmm……

  38. Mine are 23, 20, almost 17 & 12. Girl, girl, boy, girl. When they were small the big ranges of ages on a good day was wonderful; interesting independent older ones, cute cuddly baby. On a bad day they all wanted something from me at the same time that wasn’t happening!! Of course they still offer challenges but the 23 yo is away on holidays and has been sending me photos, the 20 and 16yo have gone to our beach house together (their plan) and 12 year old has been camping with her friends family for 2 days. We had only the second night in our own house without any kids in 23 years. (Have been away without them, but not at home). It is such a joy seeing our children liking spending time together and that they choose to stay in touch with each other and us. Also my baby was very glad to come home and gave me a BIG hug. They are so precious and can drive you crazy at any age!!

  39. I’m at 1,6 & 9. ; )

    It’s pretty good here right now but for a few weeks the six year old was vile…

  40. So glad I am not alone. Spend the last part of term longing for the holidays and then when they come, they are challenging. I have 8 and 5 year old. Usually they are great together but yesterday was obviously the settling phase of the holidays because they were at each other all day. Shouting, crying, fighting or playing maniac games that are full throttle until someone gets hurt. You know it will happen, you tell them it will . . . and then just wait and mop up afterwards because no one listens. It’s raining here – a lot – so I think that we have bad cabin fever too.
    Otherwise they were asking for food — which, if the 5-year-old gets her way, is always choc chip cookies.

    Pity we can’t all get together somewhere with a roaring fire and wine and let the children all run wild – they’re always happier when there are other people about.

  41. Heather says:

    4 & 14 …. both girls!
    The 4 yr old idolises her big sister…. The 14yr old is not so enamored with her little sister.
    Angst coming at us from all directions!

  42. 13
    And
    33!
    It’s easier when you know one already flew the nest so well it makes your heart skip a beat with pride. When the 13 crumbles and lashes, and refuses, I reassure myself we didn’t ruin the first one and this one will be ok too.

  43. There is light at the end of the tunnel…I think…18 and 20 here, OMG where did time go??? They both VOTED last week FFS!!!

    We should have had a 13 year old little sister annoying the shit out of them but *stillbirth* broke all our hearts all that time ago, so be grateful for your 3 girls…be very grateful Beth.

    <3

  44. 3 years, 21 months, and I am 6 months pregnant.

  45. Oh I hate a follow through too Beth but it is so necessary isn’t it. I am at: 11, 9 & 4 (well about to be 5 on Friday!!!). xx

  46. Ok, this might spin you out a little. I’m 44 and have “kids” aged 30, 26, 18 and nearly 16. I also am quite involved with my 4 divine grandkids aged 4, 19 m, 3 m and 3 w’s. There was a time of insanity when my youngest was born where I was juggling the personalities of a newborn, crazy toddler, 10 year old and a teenager! Each one of those ages requiring a different method of communication,understanding and discipline. (Which, it seems, I muddled up most of the time ?)

  47. 3.5
    21 months.
    Constant. Non-stop. Fighting. Puh-lease tell me they’ll be good little buddies soon. Pleeease.

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