To a mundane last Tuesday in Summer!

Man have I been in a bad mood for the last week. Dead SET, I am even annoying myself don’t worry about it. SO many complaints and eyerolls and WOE IS ME, it’s been very exhausting for everyone involved, namely myself. It takes quite a lot of energy to be all cranky and teary and generally over everything.

I also have had my period, so you know, there’s that.

But really, overall, it’s been pretty boring, and not that attractive.

I’m trying to turn it all around, I really am. I’m trying to nut out the problems, talk about them, cry about them. I am paying the bills, SO MANY FUCKING BILLS, I am trying to stay positive and hustle some more work to pay for the bills (oh the joys of running your own business) and just generally not spiral into self doubt and loathing while trying to get over myself. See? EXHAUSTING.

This morning as I was hanging out the washing, and it started to drizzle (fucks sake) I gave myself a little exercise in turning my bad mood on its head. I tried something that I have seen a few places where instead of saying I HAVE to….you change the vocab to I GET to…

So for instance.

I have to pay bloody BAS again. Bastard.
to
I get to pay tax and be reminded again of how lucky I am to be able to work flexibly, and at home and be with the kids. I had a successful quarter and this tax is a reminder of that hard work.
(shame is I never seem to leave the money aside for it).

Or I have to pay my stupid rates. Again.
to
I get to pay the local council rates and aren’t I lucky that we even get to live in a house that we own?
(seriously though, rates are bullshit).

Ok, let’s try this one. I have to pay an dance/hockey/whatever extra cirrcular fees for the term for the kids.
to
I get to see my kids do things that they love and are passionate about and feel confident enough to do. They are strong and healthy and exercising, being part of a team and learning about new skills, listening and learning. How good is that?

You get the drift right?

So as I GOT TO hang out my washing (as it started to drizzle) I was reminded of the fact that we have  access to clean water, we have clothes, we have rain even. It’s all good isn’t it?

On a mundane Tuesday I have reminded myself of all the good things that we have, the things we are so lucky to have and that we take for granted. It’s hardly worth getting your knickers in a knot over it is it? I imagine some of my friends who have been really sick, or even have died would give ANYTHING for a bloody mundane moment on a Tuesday.

I have my health.
I have 3 great kids.
I have a really patient husband who does a lot for all of us, even though I seem to only see all the things that he doesn’t do.
We have a wonderful home, in a beautiful part of the world.
We have rain!
I get to work on something I love, every day.

And today? To counteract all this goddamn ADULTING and money stuff that seems to be consuming me so much lately, I made a chocolate cake for “the kids”. So that when they get home from school on a mundane Tuesday afternoon, they would see a big fuck off chocolate cake with masses of icing on it and they will think. YES! How good is life? MUM YOU ARE THE BEST.

Plus? I got to lick the bowl and the mixer, without sharing with one person. And it was delicious. And of course I ate way too much until I was woozy but still. RAW CAKE MIX. You are never too old for that shit.

Because even though I have to be an adult, it’s still good to not take things too seriously, all the time.

And now? Well, I will take the washing off the line because the sun DID come out. And it dried. A timely reminder that even when things seem shite, they will soon enough not be.

And that’s something.

Do you like that shift from ‘have’ to ‘get’?
Got one you want to share with me?
And if you need to make a chocolate cake, make this one. It’s bloody good.

Comments

  1. MLMorrissey says:

    Hi Beth
    I got home all snotty about another shitty day working for the man. My nose was so out of joint, it needed serious surgery. I was fuming about the work load, the idiots I work with, the whole goddamn fight of trying to get enough money to meet the bills, run the business, blah blah blah.
    Then I read your blog. And actually we really are bloody lucky. Thank you for reminding me!

  2. Helen Dawes says:

    Agree… as Monty Python said…. Always look on the bright side of life. Last week all 4 of us were hit with gastro…. I know you know what that is like…. the whole week and weekend was a complete write off… absolutely nothing got done. Yet I told myself how lucky we were that this too would pass… we are all normally so healthy, I really feel for families with chronic health problems with sickness and constant trips to hospitals etc. I was also down and missing my Mum (she died 8 yrs ago) as I know she would have helped out and just… well… been there. To miss her so much just shows how lucky we were to have been loved for so many years.

  3. Cristina Paul says:

    Um on a side note….is that not Mags all over in that photo! Wow, I didn’t realise how much she looked like you til I saw this picture. That’s got to bring a smile to your face, it did mine :). enjoy that cake x

  4. This came at a perfect time for me…when I just can’t seem to get ‘with it’ after a vacation. I am lucky I get to take a vacation AND lucky to have a great life to get back to. It just takes a while to transition.
    So thanks for sharing. Good to know we all go through this sometimes.

  5. Readers like bloggers who don’t gloss over the tough stuff, because we are all juggling crazy things each day, and beautiful posts are uplifting and great for a while but then all the perfection gets to you. It is fantastic that you are honest about the hustling too, and why you do it. All self-employed women know about that. Today you set a whole new standard with such clarity and self analysis. Must remember to bake a cake as I manage my 94 year old father and an old dog going blind and deaf.

  6. So true! I belong to a private fb group, writing 5 things we are grateful for each day. It does make you spin things to the positive, as you have done! And hopefully it will become a habit! Good on you for spinning it around, AND MAKING CAKE!!!!

  7. Raw cake mix, Beth. YES.

  8. This is a great reminder of how powerful a shift in mindset can be, Beth.
    Here’s mine, and it’s a biggie:

    I have to get a pacemaker put in next Thursday.
    Nu-uh.
    I GET to have a pacemaker put in next Thursday, FOR FREE, because I live in Australia where we have Medicare and incredible (imperfect) public hospitals and once I GET to have my pacemaker, it will support my dicky heart and help keep me alive!

    Yep, that works.

  9. I’ve been feeling sorry for ourselves here … but things are improving
    and today is my birthday so non stop eating chocolate and icecream!
    over indulging!
    lolmxx

  10. Robyn Jokic says:

    Raw cake mix reminds me when my brother and I would bake a cake, well we never actually baked a cake cause we ate the whole mixture instead hahaha good times……yummmm still love licking that beater!

  11. Will try the shift “I have to…” to “I get to…” it really does change your perspective on things doesn’t it?!

  12. Yes Beth it’s a hard thing to do, and I think fake it till you make it with a more positive attitude, however forced it has to be initially, is a way to cope get on with things. Plus communicating.
    I’ve had a massive tantrum recently AT my husband about how little choice I feel I’ve had about where in the world we live (we move with his job), it feels much better now I’ve got that off my chest, and although doesn’t change anything, but now I’ve said my bit I feel I can move on and accept it. Lemons and lemonade and all that.
    Liz X

Speak Your Mind

*