Oh my guzica!

Ever had one of those “Oh my GOD I am the worst parent ever” moments? Maybe you dropped your kid. Or didn’t strap them in properly to the pram, or something, and they fell out? Or perhaps you just got cranky at them for whinging only to discover that they had a perforated ear drum and then you felt REALLY bad. Know what I’m talking about?

Here, come sit to me. THE WORST MOTHER IN THE WORLD.  I saved you a seat. In the shitty waiting room of the Xray this afternoon, where it was really hot and filled with many old people.

Let’s go back 8 WEEKS ago shall we? OK. Lets!

Daisy was at ballet. Like she does every Thursday afternoon in the lovely old hall in our village. The little ladies were on the floor doing stretches, and Daisy dragged herself backwards along the floorboards. The old 100 year old splintery floorboards. We know where this is going right? A VERY big splinter went through the tights and straight into her big, juicy, peachy buttock (or guza as we call it round these parts thanks to my Croatian sister in law). Her ballet teacher (and my friend) bravely removed said splinter and we nursed her pride and bottom for a few days. All was well. No complaints. No issues. End of story.

I got sick with my gall bladder. I then went to New York. She’s a big kid who deals with her own bottom mostly and while the bruise remained on the bottom, it was never complained about. It wasn’t until I got back from NY and got her out of the bath that I felt a lump where the splinter was. Maybe it was scar tissue? No complaints again, and life got in the way. More weeks passed. The lump remained. I MEANT to make an appointment, but then Rob was away, Harper got sick. Something always gets in the way doesn’t it? Last Wed we went to the GP, got a referral for an ultrasound the following day. In we trotted, on went the ultrasound and there she was! The splinter! THE 3CM SPLINTER still lodged in my daughter’s bottom. I tried to explain why it had been there for 8 weeks. Why I meant to get it done sooner. Why it was there in the first place. An appointment was made for this afternoon, the last afternoon of my solo time with the kids – just the thing for my frayed nerves!

It wasn’t pretty. Local anesthetic isn’t pretty for anyone, least of all an anxious 5 yro. Lies of “No it won’t hurt much!” were made. A tired and whingy 2 yro with a poo in her nappy asking to sit on my lap and asking for food whilst this all was happening. Screams were made. People holding the wee thing down and 45 minutes & 1 stitch later all 4 PIECES were gone.

I know. It’s OK, I know. LOOK AT IT. She is quite keen to take it to School Assembly in the morning mind you.

First stop after the toy shop was the pub, of course, for lemonades, chips and a calming Coopers Pale Ale for Mama. DEAR GOD.

I am now having a calming sauv blanc.

So tell me. What’s your worst parenting fail moment? Make me feel better. Please?


  1. Arrrrhhhh!! Poor Daisy…. Made my poor stomach churn thinking about getting that pulled out. What a trooper you have. Poor Mumma.

  2. Dropped my middle daughter on her head (not exaggerating at all unfortunately) she landed on her nose and she scored to lovely black eyes at about 11mths of age…Noice. I imagine it was worse going out in public than if I had 2 black eyes. The looks we got were horrific.

  3. Not taking my son to a doctor in America for a whole week and finding out the reason he couldn’t walk after a block was because he had croup.

  4. Oh Beth! I am sitting her drinking a rum and can totally relate. Macie split her eyebrow open yesterday after tripping over Heath’s legs and hitting her head on a chair.

    Worse thing was when the nurse offered us a “Head Injury” information sheet and we had to say “Oh no – it’s OK. This is like her third injury to her head….we actually have one of those information sheets at home already”.

    WORST FARKING FEELING EVER!! But hey – it’s life – and it’s normal. You are a great Mama. Dont you dare beat yourself up about it! X

  5. Oooooh I feel your pain (and Daisy’s). An extreme case of mother guilt. I can’t top that one but I will relate what happened with my sister……sore foot. Ignored by parent. Complained. Constantly. Finally asked – well what do you want me to do? Take you to the doctor? Yes! Result – broken foot. Never been allowed to forget it .

  6. Ow! That looks like it would have hurt, poor bambina. Scout had a cough for about 3 weeks when she was 3 y.o and one day Husband and I kinda went “Durh, let’s take her to the GP just to be on the safe side”. She DIDN’T SEEM SICK. Running and jumping around as normal, just with a horrible cough. Turns out she had freaking pneumonia. PNEUMONIA. Felt so bad.

  7. I havent had my moment with my son yet.. but my husband had a giant splinter in his bottom from sliding down a wooden skate ramp.. I can’t imagine the embarrassment of a 15 year old getting his mates to pull an 11cm stick out of his rear end! he still had it in a specimen jar when we started dating… hot!

  8. Not going to the hospital with Oscar’s first bout of cellulitis until after my MIL’s 70th b’day yum cha gathering was a particular career highlight. Felix falling off our bed and hitting his head on the edge of his cot, landing a haematoma so big I kept telling mum no, it was just a shadow another moment. I could go on and on. But dude, I’d have necked that beer and 10 more after that palaver.

  9. Just last week my eldest son(5 yrs old) put a small paintbrush in my youngest sons (2 yrs old) and perforated his ear drum… You should have seen the looks the doctors gave me when we were explaining it.

    Hope Daisy is feeling better soon!

  10. Ouch!! She’s a stoic one that Daze!
    The boy was in Prep when he came a cropper on the ashphalt at school (is there anything worse?!) – did a mega job of scabbing up his knees. Complained all weekend about how he couldn’t straighten his right knee, it was SOOO sore, he was dying blah blah blah…I told him (after some time being supportive mum) to stop whining and grow up. Yes. I know. Fast forward to Monday, the swelling had gone down and yep, there it is….that knee cap looks like it’s a bit screwy…Took him to the osteo and yup, lucky not to have dislocate the knee. How big did I feel??? Yeah, you big, horrible, mean old mum telling him to grow up. *SHAME*!!!

  11. Oh I feel like I have one every day.

    The most common ones are accidentally clipping part of Baby C’s delightfully plump belly into his car seat or his pram or his high chair buckles.

    The worst was when Baby C had septic arthritis in his knee and we chalked his incessant screams up to teething.
    It wasn’t until I went to put him down one day…because his screaming was driving me nuts…and his leg collapsed beneath him that we went to the ER.

    I don’t think I am going to win parent of the year any time soon!

  12. Poor little love! reminded me of having stitches when I was 5, I screamed so loudly that the entire hospital ground to a halt (it probably didn’t.. that’s just what my mum says now when she tells the tale!)

    My aunt (who is a physiotherapist) told my cousin to pull him self together and stop complaining, sent him off to school.. with a broken ankle….


  13. How long have you got…..x

  14. Tough kid! Don’t be too hard on yourself. I loved that you let us in on that. I don’t have any thing to add as I am not a mumma yet but can remember nearly every injury being overlooked!! LOL.

  15. I sent my daughter to school for 2 days with a broken arm after she fell in a jumping castle at her dad’s birthday. A few complaints of not being able to hold her pencil or get dressed without screaming made me take her to the local Emergency department, with me rolling my eyes at the X ray man saying “she reckons she’s broken it”, his reply- “She has- in three places”

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  17. I dislocated my sons elbow when he was 18 months old while shopping in target. So don’t drag your kid by the arm when they won’t walk! Poor daisy! And poor you!

  18. We thought it was gastro. It turned out to be HSP, a weirdarse rare disease. It took a week for me to take him to hospital because everyday I thought he would get better and the gp said it was gastro. I didn’t trust my gut instinct and still hate myself a little bit for it. xxx

  19. Oh wow! That’s a big arse {excuse the pun} splinter! That girl has an awesome pain threshold Beth to sit on that beauty for 8 weeks!! What a trooper.
    And, you’re not alone with the bad mumma thing. My daughter {now 4} wasn’t strapped in the pram when she was about 18months – we were in the shops, she leaned over to grab something on the shelf in the 2 dollar shop, the pram tipped she scraped her whole face along the metal shelf as she fell out and was then pinned down by the pram & shelf.
    Then to ice the cake….a week later, she had a stack on the playground at the park – took a chip out of her front tooth and was left with a piece of blue paint {from the metal playground} for months! It finally fell out, but she’s still left with a huge chunk missing from her tooth.
    Enjoy that Sauv.

  20. Charmaine Campbell says

    OMG that is huge! Poor kid!
    My daughter (Harper) rolled off the bench and onto the tiled floor after I changed her nappy when she was a baby! I cried more than she did!

  21. Poor darlin! Where do I start with my boy?! He’s rolled off the bed onto the bedside table as a baby, AFTER I told Hubby that I had to go get a panadol so technically it’s his fault! As a toddler I stepped away from the change table for seriously about 2 seconds, he fell off slamming head first onto the floor. Knocked himself out cold, picture hysterically screaming Mother and you get the picture. Spent the night in the Emergency ward, vomiting ensued on the way home followed by two black eyes in the morning. The list is endless. But he’s a strapping 14 year old boy, so no damage done! Oh and my girlfriend’s son was complaining of a sore wrist for 3 weeks, finally she took him to the Doctor last week and yep his wrist is FRACTURED!! She felt so bad. Whoops!!

  22. The eldest now 17 broke his foot, took him for a x-ray & was told it was a soft tissue injury…..ummm no, 3 weeks later my 2 yr old was still crawling around the floor, another x-ray & it was broken…Too late to plaster it then….Youngest broke his arm at soccer training went home had a bath & went to bed, went to the Dr’s 4.00 the next afternoon & sure enough it was broken…felt like the worst Mother in the world…Same son had a tick in his back, we were on holidays & I kept meaning to have a look at what he was complaining about, but things kept happening, husband flew home & I stayed with the kids, ended up at the Vet’s to see if they could get it out…..ummm no, they can’t off to the Hospital for it to be taken out…

  23. The eldest now 17 broke his foot, took him for a x-ray & was told it was a soft tissue injury…..ummm no, 3 weeks later my 2 yr old was still crawling around the floor, another x-ray & it was broken…Too late to plaster it then….Youngest broke his arm at soccer training went home had a bath & went to bed, went to the Dr’s 4.00 the next afternoon & sure enough it was broken…felt like the worst Mother in the world…Same son had a tick in his back, we were on holidays & I kept meaning to have a look at what he was complaining about, but things kept happening, husband flew home & I stayed with the kids, ended up at the Vet’s to see if they could get it out…..ummm no, they can’t off to the Hospital for it to be taken out…

  24. Oh yes mother of the year might have to go with me
    Trying to help my son off the Trampoline and dropping him on the pavement result broken elbow
    Me trying to explain myself at emergency that I was a good mother!!!
    I had a good excuse pregnant ahhhh results in clumsy
    We’ve all been there right???

  25. My worst parenting moment is made even worse because it is a worse STEP parenting moment. My 12 year old step daughter was at ballet one night and she hurt her ankle. When she got home we iced it and sent her off to bed. It’s just a little sprain, you’ll be right in the morning. The next day she mentioned it was still sore but it wasn’t bruised or swollen so off she went to school and back to her Mum’s that night. Next thing we know a few days later she comes back home with her foot in a cast and on crutches. She had broken the bone that runs down from her big toe down along her foot. Yep. That went down well didn’t it!!

    As for ballet – dangerous hobby that one!

  26. My mum and dad just kept going on about what a horrible screaming tantrum throwing kid I was until they decided to take me to the doctor turns out I was allergic to my asthma medicine.

    Your definitely not a bad parent! The job seems hard!!


  27. I was so wrapped in my WPFM that I forgot to wish poor little Daisy big hugs! So big hugs cute Daisy! And hugs to Mum too x

  28. Oh bless her bottom cheeks!!
    Ha, from the first trip home with our first born on her first car seat ride, half way home i said to my husband “don’t panicky parents have at least one parent sit next to the baby??” yet we continued to drive, both of us up front, & by the time we got home we realised we hadn’t actually done the straps right. From that day on, we were always going to forgive ourselves for the ridiculous!!
    We’ve left babies on change tables & driven off, locked the house up with a child still outside on a bike . . . i’d like to say we have too many children but it’s always the same child we leave behind (the 3rd girl) & she’s the only one i ever dropped on her head too. Love Posie

  29. I locked my 2 yr old in the car while at the footy. Had to drag hubby off the ground while I drive his car home to get my spare keys! Jodie

  30. hmmmm mine is a shocker!! my 6 month old was crying all night!! (we had run out of flippen panadol!!!) next moring a tooth cut through! ummmmm i accidently closed the car door on babies head! not hand, head! worst mother of the year- to me! oh, how could i forget my most recent- squirted a whole syringe of nurofen in her face/eyes.I hope reading this you feel a teeny bit better. Being a mother is damn hard at times.xx

  31. My husband amputated our youngest boys thumb in the shower door the day before his first birthday party. We rocked up at the new RCH ED the day it opened. It was a bit crazy!! He was fine, a bit of plastic surgery, a cool bandage, an overnight stay and a fair few Coopers for mum & dad! And he made it to his party. I had 6kg of sausages to get through!

    Then there was the time my 3 year old ran into the kitchen bench and broke his nose. I told him to stop complaining but after a week took him to the doctor to be told it was broken…

    Feel for you! We’ve all been there. L x

  32. Holy smoker, that is a tremendous story, (beautifully told too) and one she will no doubt bring out to make you feel bad for the rest of your life. I can’t match it, but you have my heartfelt sympathy. Now I need a Cooper’s Pale Ale to recover. 😉 xx

  33. Holy Crap Beth, I think you might win.. either that or I’m just blocking my pathetic parenting out. Yeap that’s probably it.
    Ouch. She’s one tough cookie.
    At least it had a happy ending.

  34. Poor little baby..:-(… So i’ll make you feel better… After unloading a car full of grocceries and bringing them through the front door, i must have locked my 18mnth old out the front. We lived on a very busy road and had a channel right next to our house… I had finished packing away the grocceries when i heard a small knock on the front door… I went to answer it and it was my baby… Smiling up at me… Shed been out there for at least 15 minutes… Because i also wiped out the fridge as i was packing things away…inhad no idea id done it… My family still has never let me live it down, and layla is now 9 years old!!!!… Dont sweat it Beth… There will be ahit loads more moments like this… Truat me!!!… We do the beat we can…:-) xxxxxx

  35. Hooly Dooly is that a splinter!
    Don’t feel bad, it’s an awesome story to tell!

  36. All these stories are GOLD! We can all refer back to this page next time there’s an incident!

  37. Three trips to emergency in one month for different head injuries, all with stitches, one with a general anaesthetic beginning the week he turned two. Good times.

    My son is like Daisy and doesn’t complain, so the check of the body in the bath is my best bet for finding bites, ticks, bumps and cuts…splinters! And I’ve found a few too. The only good thing about this strange stoicism is if he does cry or scream I know it’s serious.

    So glad it’s all over for you and Daisy and her little bottom is splinter free. Toys and lemonade make everything all right.

  38. Oh yes, here you go. I was recently crowned Mother Of The Year when my TWO YEAR OLD twins escaped, made it to the main road and attempted to board a bus to the RUGBY. I, meanwhile, didn’t even realise they were missing until a kindly stranger appeared on my doorstep one twin under each arm. There’s more here; it’s actually a rather hilarious tale – or will be, in about 18 years when I stop hyperventilating every time I think about it. http://www.metomum.blogspot.com.au/2012/09/the-great-escape-of-2012.html
    You couldn’t have known, so be kind to yourself xxx

  39. Oh God, poor little girl.

    I once put the baby in the bouncer and forget to strap him in and he launched across the room and landed face down.

    Bad Mother.

  40. Have linked this to a mate who went thru exactly the same thing – except hers was a 9 yr old boy and their back deck. He took His splinter to show and tell… big hit

    My husband and I had to hold our 12 yr old down today to get his immunisations – parenting. Never simple. NEVER SIMPLE

  41. I left my son on the change table for just a second to grab a nappy from the box, having forgotten to fill the shelf underneath…he took that split second to roll over for the very first time and rolled right off the side. Luckily he landed on a table I had beside the change table…but I felt terrible for weeks…still do really….and he’s 12 now!!

  42. Where shall I begin! How about the time when Isaac was 4 & he was riding his bike & banged his elbow on the wooden pole on the varandah. He screamed & I instantly grabbed his arm & shook it about telling him it was ok & not broken. He cried some more & sat in the lounge for 5 hours with an ice pack on it with me every half hour or so shaking & stretching his arm to make sure it was ok. Finally he says ” mum it hurts all the way to my back now mum”. I decided it was time to see a doctor & rushed to emergency to be told HE HAD BROKEN HIS ARM!!! I started crying because I am clearly THE WORST MUM IN THE WORLD!!!
    Two months to the day he broke the arm again in the exact same spot. There was no fucking around this time, I took him straight to the hospital. One more break & I’m pretty sure they call child protection…..

  43. Get stuffed I am so not committing them to paper for my kids to use against me later!

  44. On the same day, one of my twins fell out of unstrapped in high chair and the other fell if change table!, Jodie

  45. She is one tough cookie that Daisy! Character building? We have those shining moments constantly …’stop whining about your (broken) foot (15 weeks plaster and 15 weeks of mother guilt!!!) & we went to dr for first couple of split chins but wised up and stocked up in steristrips for the rest!!! Character building!! Bet Daisy was stoked to have a lemonade ….it fixes everything! What a day!! Hx

  46. Glad all is well now and how brave you all are. Yeeoowwchhh!!!!
    My prem baby was home a month. On the lounge and I turned my back for a second and she somehow flipped off and into carpet. Thank god for carpet! Drove myself sick with worry that I was a terrible mother. After a rush gown to drs and the all clear AND the reassurance from my dr saying “it happens and it’s an accident”, I felt a slight SLIGHT bit better.

  47. I am really embarrassed to write this in a public forum!!…but as we are all being honest – I forgot to pick my son up from preschool. I had lunch and a wine with a girlfriend and was focused on getting back in time to pick Ella up from school at 3.15. At 3.08 as I drove towards Ella’s school I suddenly remembered that I had a son and his pick up time is 3pm!!!!! I was mortified. I got there 15 minutes late and had to lie as to why I was late – he had only just started preschool and I couldn’t admit that I had actually forgotten him. How dreadful!

  48. Okay this is really embarrassing to admit but I forgot to pick my son up from preschool! I was at lunch with a girlfriend and was focused on picking ella up from school by 3.15. At 3.08 as I was heading to ella’s school I remembered that I have a son and his pickup is 3pm!!!!! I was mortified. I got there about 3.15 and lied about why I was late saying I couldn’t get my car started which was pathetically lame. He had only just started at the preschool and the teachers didn’t know me so I couldn’t actually admit that I had forgotten him! Dreadful. I am super paranoid now when it comes to getting there on time!

  49. Oh Beth we all have these stories as parents, and are bound to collect more along the way. I’ve had a few in my almost 4 years of being a Mumma: ignoring cries and telling my son to go back to sleep when the poor thing’s ear was about to burst! Perforated ear drum and trip to the local hospital the next day (we were away on holiday).
    Leaving my son in a bouncer thing when he was younger to come back minutes later and find he’d lent forward and somehow trapped himself under the bar…
    Numerous times driving off and then being told,”Mum,I’m not strapped in.” Me: “Don’t tell Dad. Here’s a chocky frog.”

    The worst for me though? Hearing my 16 month old daughter making weird noises in her cot early one morning after a feed and ignoring them because I just wanted to go back to sleep, to then realising the weird noises had turned into vomiting noises. I go into her room to see her having a seizure; a dash up to the hospital, put into a medically induced coma and flown to Melbourne (4 hours away) to ICU. The guilt of not going into her room sooner will stay with me FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE. We don’t know what was wrong, she was given antibiotics to treat for meningitis but the docs aren’t 100% convinced that is what was wrong. She’s fine now, two months down the track.

    It’s a scary job, this parenting thing. That quote? ‘Making the decision to have a child is momentous. It is forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body’-Elizabeth Stone. SO TRUE.

  50. ok so mine isn’t the “worst mother in the world” award for the medical/accident category, but last year I missed the deadline to enrol my daughter into the gifted and talented education program so that she could chose which schools to apply to for high school…. I’d been telling her for days “ok ok I’ll do it, don’t worry honey” – then the day I logged on to do it was the day AFTER IT FREAKING CLOSED!! There were NO second chances :'(


  51. One day my brother asked mum if he could have his arm in a sling, mum thought he was just copying another kid in the street who had a broken arm. A few days later he got really sick and she took him to the doctor, when asked about the sling she said: “Oh that’s nothing.” When the doctor looked at his arm there was a bright red line running up it. He had blood poisoning! If they’d left it any longer he would have been in real trouble.

    There was also the time my dad pulled my 3yo brother’s arm who was running away at the shops and accidently dislocated his elbow. At the ER, my brother kept saying: “My dad did it. He did on purpose!”

  52. Holy crap, that thing is better out than in. Poor Daisy, amazing what the human body can cope with… would have thought it would hurt a lot more than it obviously did. Don’t blame yourself lady, it’s not easy being a mind reader… and that’s exactly what we’re expected to be as Mama’s. There are too many bad mother moments for me to go into… but probably forgetting to fasten the straps on the car seat and only realising once I reached the destination is up there with them. Shocking! xo

  53. oh god, too many to mention, how about a recap on the big ones: dislocated elbow? (you’ll be right) 24 hours later still carrying arm, fingers a bit blue, hmm maybe we might go to dr… roaring UTI’s…oh, the time oldest was having a seziure (stop mucking about and get off the floor!)… but from the comments here today thank GOODNESS it seems I am not alone!

  54. Oh some of these are golden.
    My girl complained of an itchy ear. Yes dear, it’ll be alright tomorrow. Repeat for a few days until my dad found a massive tick implanted right behind her ear. Frightened me to think what if. Must pay more attention…

  55. Totally calling DOCS

  56. once when WE went to sydney- an 8-9 hour drive for us and when we got there our 18 month old first(we have 3) baby couldn’t walk, he was stumbling all over the place. Off to Westmead children’s hospital where they put in an IV, did blood tests and they xrayed him and could not find anything wrong with him, at this time I am imagining Polio or some other hideous illness, but they convinced us that it must have been a bit of a virus.

    When we were leaving and strapping him back into his car seat we noticed that his legs were cramped and squashed behind the car seat. I must have pushed my chair back into his legs which had then squashed them and must have cut off the circulation a bit. He was fine the next day and every day afterwards!!!!

    • That’s funny…..similar to me. My 2 yr old on his first flight, had a seat to himself, and he is small, lowest percentile, so I buckled up his seat belt and before the plane took off he vomited, then vomited again. Flight attendants and me in a fluff cleaning vomit and hoping for the best. Anyway as the plane started heading to the runway I noticed I had done his seat belt up so tight it was squishing his little stomach right up, so that’s why he was chucking. No more vomits the whole flight once I loosened it…oops.

    • That’s funny…..similar to me. My 2 yr old on his first flight, had a seat to himself, and he is small, lowest percentile, so I buckled up his seat belt and before the plane took off he vomited, then vomited again. Flight attendants and me in a fluff cleaning vomit and hoping for the best. Anyway as the plane started heading to the runway I noticed I had done his seat belt up so tight it was squishing his little stomach right up, so that’s why he was chucking. No more vomits the whole flight once I loosened it…oops.

  57. here’s another one- Forgot – completely forgot a Mother’s day Liturgy at my daughter’s school when she was 6 in year 1. I didn’t even have to work that day! it wasn’t until I was at the checkout of the Supermarket just before 3 and another mOther said what happened to you this morning? Couldn’t you get to the Liturgy? Visions of my daughter being the motherless one standing at the front of the church waiting for her mummy to come and get her and then having to sit with the teachers is one that will remain with me forever and sent me into a raging tearfest on the way home. Oh how I cursed my forgetfulness!! But back then I was a completely stressed out, run down mummy, with a dying mother myself trying to fit just too much in!!!! I soon learned that to forgive myself I had to make these sorts of events and my kiddos my absolute no. 1 priority.

  58. In the depths of night shift, an hour’s sleep per night, 4 nights a week, & toddler raisin’ during the day, I didn’t hear my son wake up one morning.

    His cries woke me up what I knew were some time after he had woken.

    His cries were supposed to trigger those maternal hormones within me that jerk every Mother awake every morning.

    But they didn’t work that morning.

    I absolutely howled, wanted to take him to a child psychologist to see if there may be any Sigmund Freud-risqué psychological damage, & I spent months beyond that morning thinking I was a piece of shit.

    Now I’m kinder to myself.

    I failed him that morning, but it was only because I was working my arse off trying to make a better life for my family.

    It took a bottle of champagne, & a D&M with my best friend to admit one night what I had done.

    She said every way I do right by him surpasses that one failure 🙂

    Be kind to yourself Beth 🙂 you just created some 21st speech material.

    Max will tell everyone how I slept through him waking up, & crying.

    I’ll be in the psychology department, right next to that X Ray dept. having my child examined for any damage I may have done to him that morning,

    We love you x

  59. A bad husband story. 2 year old daughter fell at big brother’s school. Very sore arm lots of tears. Rushed her to the doctor who happened to be her daddy who said ” Don’t worry it’s nothing.”
    2 nights of no sleep and very distressed child I took her to the local hospital where i was told my darling girl had a ‘nasty break of her arm.” She never let him forget it and still reminds him 19 years later!

  60. Oh lovely, there’s not enough room here! Mine has made it to 9, and she’s still going strong. You’re just a normal, busy mama. And just think, Daisy can use this story in blog comments when she gets older xx

  61. When I fell off our swing set and started screaming as a 7 year old, mum was on the phone so I was told to shoosh and go away. I think I continued screaming for a good ten minutes while she finished her conversation! Two days later I was still complaining, so off to the doctor we went. Needless to say I came out with a cast on my arm. 20 years later Mum doesn’t seem to have any residual guilt over it though! Kerry

  62. Ugly step mother award goes to me- Many years ago my 5 year old stepdaughter & 7 year old step son where playing with toy guns- The type that shoot small plastic pellets. (Not my choice of ideal toy, but that’s another issue) Anyway stepdaughter comes to us in tears saying that her brother shot a pellet into her ear. Both her farther and I agree that the chances of the pellet entering the ear “by accident” are next to zero-right? Search of ear revels nothing. Hysterical stepdaughter insists it’s in there and that we need to look with a torch. We interrogate Stepson but he is adamant that he didn’t “deliberately” shoot the pellet into her ear. She CONFIRMS his story. Something fishy is going on here… Toy guns are confiscated. Cries of outrage from both children but nothing more mentioned about pellet in the ear. Home they go. 2 weeks later we get a call from their Mother. Stepdaughter in hospital with ear infection and having plastic pellet removed from her ear. Do we know how the pellet got into her ear because Stepdaughter “can’t remember”? Umm actually no! We can honestly say we don’t know how they pellet got into her ear but we have an idea….

  63. My middle daughter was 18 months and running around the backyard of my friends house when she fell off a low set of stairs onto concrete. She cried for a bit then calmed down. We went home, ad lunch, she had her afternoon sleep, and the day moved on as usual. The next morning we had our usual rush to get one adult to his job 1hour 30 mins commute away, the 18 month and 3 year olds to child care and me to work. 5.30pm I arrive at childcare to pick up the kids and notice that something looks a bit weird about my daughters head. I touch it. It moves, in, it’s blue and black and a weird purple colour. AAAAAAAAAA!

    I bludge a lift from one of the workers to the hospital because my husband has the car and after a 30 minute wait see someone. An hour later she is having a X-ray. It’s a broken head! She has a fracture that goes from just above her left ear to all the way around the back. Now they have to do a CT-scan to ensure there is no internal damage or bleeding. By this time my husband who has rushed home is in tears. I’m being the strong one but feel ill. At midnight after a number of failed attempts to sedate her the regions head anaethetist has been woken from his slumber and brought in to administer an adult dose of anaesthetic to my tiny (below the smallest percintile mind you) baby girl in order to knock her out long enough to take a scan.

    Finally it’s done, she’s fine, It will heal spontaneously, we stay overnight to ensure no reaction to the anaesthetic. It took me over 24 hours to realise a small child who falls head first onto concrete may need to see a medical professional. Worlds worst Mother.

  64. Oooohhhh yeah – I got one, Joe was 1 and Billie 2.5 and Jonnie spent 4 days in hospital waiting room, waiting for an operation on his tendon he cut at work on his wrist. His wasn’t classed as emergency enough so kept being cancelled. This was day 4 so Mummy’s patience was wearing a little THIN to say the least. Anyway, i had Joe in my arms and was trying to get Billie to come with me as we were going somewhere. She chucked a big molten tantrum as only a 2YO can, I got her by the elbow and YANKED her up YELLING at her all the while. I pulled that wee little elbow out of its socket and had to take her to the ER – imagine my pride explaining that to the triage nurse………

  65. our paeditrician fessed up to the old kid with a broken leg story also if that makes anyone feel better. His son hurt his leg playing soccer, kid in pain, mum concerned, dad (being a you know paeditrician and all) ahhh youll be right mate just put a bit of ice on it and go to sleep

    And yep – wake up the next morning and its all swollen so off to Emergency, xrays reveal a bad break….and no he didnt tell them he was a doctor!

    So if a medically trained parent can do it then I think we are all off the hook a little – yes?

  66. You handled it all beautifully.
    I am with Mrs Woog, too many to mention, have been in ED and Xray dept on last day of school days pre Xmas etc etc totally pissed off with the waiting and heat and still I didnt get the seriousness of it all…

  67. We’ve all been there.
    I once drove my daughter home in the car and had forgotten to do up her carseat buckles. It was only a 2 minute drive but I felt SICK for weeks. I’ve never told anyone (until now!).
    Hope Daisy’s on the mend… what a splinter!

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