The power of the voodoo, who do? You do.

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Remind me of the babe!

Anyone else remember that great song from one of my all time favourite movies The Labyrinth. David Bowie and all that hair. That music! Those puppets! Those glittery, maze walls were the stuff that dreams were made of for me when I was a 9 year old girl watching it. I know my friend Eden loves the line in it when Jennifer Connelly is falling down a well(?) I think and she is stopped by hands. They ask her:

Helping Hand: Yes, which way?
Sarah: Well… since I’m pointed that way, I guess I’ll go down.
Helping Hand: She chose DOOOOOWN!
Helping Hand: She chose *down*? Heh!
(They let go)
Sarah: Was that wrong?
Helping Hand: Too late now!

I’ve never forgotten that line and there’s been plenty of times throughout my life where down seems the right way to go, especially when you are already heading in that direction. I’ve had it at various times when I guess I might have been depressed at the time (never diagnosed but if I had sought medical advice I probably would have been) living with an ex partner and being thoroughly miserable, or when I had Harper and she was sick all the time and life and work and juggling everything seemed SO hard. You are heading that way, so you may as well keep going. I’ve been lucky to be the kind of person that can usually steer myself back into the right direction: changing diet, trying to exercise more, staying positive will usually get me back on track. And for that I’m lucky.

This pregnancy has left me feeling all kinds of things and feelings. Being a Mum to small people (like really small and in this case in the womb small) always makes you feel vulnerable. As they get older, you get more confident (of course the problems are still there and are ever changing and actually more complex and emotional as they tap into your own stuff from when YOU were a kid that actually doesn’t seem like that long ago). But the small kids –  the babies, the toddlers, I think the sheer exhaustion that comes with raising children at that time can leave you feeling exposed and vulnerable and not confident and for me, those are the times that all those other things can come to the forefront: the self loathing about our bodies, self esteem, career, relationships etc. They just go hand in hand.

I’m anxious about all the things ahead of me. The change to our routines (all of ours as it’s not just about me now, it’s Rob and the girls, the dog) about not getting a good nights sleep for GOD KNOWS HOW LONG WHAT WERE WE THINKING, about stopping my “career” or “work” and being left behind. All kinds of things. And after a particularly bad mercury retrograde (told you I was bonkers) I spoke to a friend who said I need to make an appointment to see someone to get that shit sorted before the baby comes.

And because I am a good listener. I did as I was told and went and made an appointment with a Kinesiologist last week. Therapist may have been better you say? Maybe. But I’m always open to a little voodoo and had heard lots of recommendations from various people and also? Why not!

The Australian Kinesiology Association has this definition: “Kinesiology encompasses holistic health disciplines which use the gentle art of muscle monitoring to access information about a person’s well being. Originating in the 1970’s, it combines Western techniques and Eastern wisdom to promote physical, emotional,mental and spiritual health. Kinesiology identifies the elements which inhibit the body’s natural internal energies and accessing the life enhancing potential within the individual.” A little like acupuncture uses pressure points around the body to help energy (chi) flow I THINK that this does something similar. From what I can gather it taps into your emotional state of well being that could in turn have a physical effect on your body (and I could be completely wrong here so don’t be offended if I am totally wrong).

In I went, filling in my form and wondering what the hell I was doing in a crystal filled cottage in Bowral on a Thursday afternoon. There was nothing wrong with me per se, certainly nothing physical, but I tried my best to explain all of the things I was hoping to be OK with in the coming up transition. Being the control freak that I am, throwing a baby into the mix will undo any control that I “think” that I might have.

2 hours later I walked out of there feeling a little headachy and hungry (what? I’m pregnant) and the following days I certainly felt emotional and exhausted and now? Well? Anything? It’s hard to say. Maybe?! I have a mantra written down that I am looking at and reading over each day. I am visualising myself being OK with change. With whatever will be. I am feeling more positive and perhaps my chakras have a direct effect on my bowels because everything is working ticket boo in that department and I’m happy if that’s all that comes from it.

I’d love to know what alternate therapies (if any) you use for self improvement? Or do you think that it’s all a crock of shite?

For me, I am open to most things and will happily give anything a try once. Especially when it comes to me. I figure that if I’m no good, than what good am I to the rest of the family? They NEED me to be good, I NEED me to be good. Anything is worth a shot.

Tapped into the voodoo lately?
What did you do?
Ever seen  a Kinesiologist?
Do chakras and chi make your bowels work better?

Comments

  1. A good old fashioned psychologist and traditional Chinese medicine have been my saviours. Exactly what you mentioned above: the stuff that happened when I was a kid, the same age as my big girl is now: has triggered anxiety & fear. But the combo of the herbs and the psych are fantastic (Caveat: you must have FANTASTIC psych)

  2. yoga. It has been a great help to me, using the body to discipline the mind.
    Plus you get to wear funky leggings. But, in all seriousness, yoga is a great tool.
    I had reiki once, it did nothing for me. Not saying it’s a crock, just not my thing.

    • I am going to get into yoga post baby…have always wanted to!

      • Sam Leader says

        +1 to yoga! Please check out the online yoga service at http://www.yogapad.com.au, my dear friend Jeanette runs it. If you like what you see please let me shout you a subscription. I started up when baby #3 was about one. I do a 45 minute class each evening when the kids go to bed and Game. Changed. Of its many gifts most noticeable are the fact I have upper body strength now. And a sense of perspective. You won’t regret it!

  3. I love holistic counselling which encompasses the whole person and considers mind, body and soul as all connected, it really works for me. Meditation is also good for me so you think I would do it more often but…
    I also love EFT (emotional freedom technique or tapping). It sounds a bit voodoo-ey but it works I tell you!!!
    And you are SO right Beth, our families need US to be good so that we can be good for them.
    Good luck with everything 🙂

  4. GOOD GIRL POOKIE! Anything that slows your mind from racing is very good for you xx

    • WHAT ^^^SHE^^^ said. Sound advice Mrs Woog…. Have a great time in Whistler, it was my home for 2 years. If a symbolic healing crystal or object stands out for you there, bring one back for Bmac…. and one for you. The power of the mountains is incredible.

  5. You never know what will work and having an open mind is the best start! For me, I did the Calmbirth course when pregnant with my first baby and the main message I took away from the course was to surrender – to the labour, the birth, to parenthood and to my life changing in the most dramatic way. We had some awful events in our lives during my pregnancy and I’m sure that message helped me trememdously, and even more so during those first few months as a first time mum when you wing it and wonder how the hell you can keep going with all this new responsibility.
    My husband told me to make a resilience card – to keep in my wallet, pin to the fridge, or have on my phone screen. Sometimes I use a photo, or a quote…anything to bring me back to that place where I know everything will be ok.
    Of course there are rough times but your wonderful relationship with your husband, your two daughters and your family and friends are going to get you through and be all the richer for the experience to come. Best of luck with everything, especially with all the emotional stuff coming your way. These little miracles make such a big impact!!

    • I’m doing calm birth in a few weeks time!

      • Gibbergunyah says

        Well, I am a psychologist and I’ve been to a psychologist and I did Calmbirth twice within 2 years (yes, it was THAT good). So I would second both Reemski and Lisa. Peter Jackson at Calmbirth is fantastic and also a therapist, as well as a midwife. Finding the psychologist who is fantastic for you is key.

      • We just recorded our story with Peter to use in the classes so you might see some of it! I’m pregnant with my second now and can’t wait to go back for a refresher course!

      • Calm birth is so worth doing Beth. In the 6 months before my last daughter was born my grandfather, obstetrician, brother and grandmother all died in quick succession so you can imagine where my head was during that period of my life. Calmbirth was truly a godsend. Just taking time out to do the course (which for me meant driving from Sydney to Bowral for one on one sessions) gave my mind a chance to breathe and process everything that was going on. Life can feel incredibly hard sometimes and it is difficult not to feel overwhelmed even when the joy of a new baby is just around the corner. From the snippets of your life you share on your blog you strike me as immensely capable or if you aren’t you do brilliantly in the fake it til you make it department. Let’s never forget children are remarkably able to cope with all manner of cackhanded attempts at parenthood so I sm sure Baby-Mac The Third and you and your lovely family will muddle along together just fine. Be kind to yourself and whatever it is that keeps your boat afloat go for it I say x

      • I did calmbirth when I was pregnant with my lad, and it helped a lot. I did end up having a c/section (again) but I was indeed a lot calmer about it all than I had been with my daughter. There was so much other painful life and death stuff going on when I was pregnant with him and straight after he came, I’m sure it helped me with that as well.
        When I was pregnant with my first child (our daughter!) I kept saying to everyone that I was going to have the baby that slept all night and didn’t cry – when I kept getting the whole “Oh, babies” etc line. You know what – I got the kid that slept all night and didn’t cry. Put it out there to the universe and you never know!!

        • Mary J, I totally agree. My daughter had a baby 7 months ago. My daughter is so calm and the baby has been a text book baby. She said she was having the one that slept and didn’t cry much and that’s what she got. My daughter was pretty much the same as a baby too.

        • I shall start saying it out loud daily Mary!!

  6. Kinesiology is amazing! When I first started reading your post, I thought “kinesiology would be perfect for you” and BOOM.

    • I wrote way more than that… Weird.
      Anyway.. What said was that I felt he exact same after my first session… Shouldn’t it have been all sunshine and rainbows? Shouldn’t I have a whole new sense or calm or something?
      Keep at it. Kinesiology is a game changer. The more sessions, the more everything flows in the right direction (although sounds like your bowels already are!)
      We quite literally hold onto our shit – and kinesiology is such an awesome way to break those cycles and move forward with a whole lot more clarity.
      Keep at it love. It’s will get better. Promise. xx

  7. Reiki and hypnotherapy have changed my life. Helping with depression and anxiety they have truly been amazing.

  8. I’m into it! … I have tried quite a few voodoo things in my time beth!
    haven’t tried kinesiology, but a friend swears by it!
    I’ve had gestalt therapy, energy balancing with tuning forks and I would come out of there floating on cloud nine! … I like that! … just like after a good meditation!
    I constantly use EFT! it really is good! for quickly stopping me from getting out of control!
    aka panic attack/phobias teach the girls too it can’t hurt and it is very grounding and centering!
    spelling up the creek though!;0 … love m:)X

  9. Beth, you are going to be just fine. Everything is going to fall into place when this gorgeous little bundle comes….trust me… I have been in your exact spot…with the big gap between Harry and Clancy. I was back to square one, back in the darkness of self doubt, back in THAT place. I didn’t think I would ever see the light again, but I am finally in it Beth – Clancy is 3.5 and I am finally in the light and feeling in control again. You are so organised and sorted Beth, you will be fine. And you will be so shocked and how much easier things are third time around, with those little helpers, it is amazing – and you realise you don’t need all the CRAP that you had with the first two, because they actually do survive without it. I was so much more relaxed with number 3 (and I am a control freak/highly strung crazy girl). You will be unreal, you just will. Don’t be so bloody hard on yourself Betharoonie.

  10. Cheers to that Miss Chardy. I remember being exactly where you are Beth when I had my third – older two off to school, career ticking along nicely, routines in place. But my anxiety – could I do it, would we cope, would my son and daughter cope? Didn’t help when I got pneumonia at 25 wks. But can honestly say – best thing we ever did. Of course there will be moments of aaaghh but you will manage it, better than you think & better than you did before. You think those girls love Frank? Wait til that little one arrives.

  11. My daughter loved The Labyrinth growing up, she is about your age now, but ‘The bog of Eternal stench’ is still referenced in our house!
    All the best, Glenda xx

  12. I haven’t tried that voo doo stuff 😉 (I am open to it though).
    Meditation doesn’t seem to work for me. I can’t concentrate on a lotus flower or some other thing for long enough, my mind runs away on me. I am more a go trim the hedges, weed the garden, bake something tasty or go and sit on the beach kind of person.
    Magnesium and KikkiK are my things.
    Writing lists, organising time tables etc are great distractions for me. They channel my racing mind and help me feel slightly in control, of at least something. Plus it is cute and I get a kick out of crossing stuff off lists.
    I also like their vision boards. I dig motivational stuff. Candles burning. Music in the background and a crumb free floor.

    • Pity the we are too far from the beach to make it a frequent thing but heading to Callala Bay is beautiful and grounding for me ( I just don’t like the drive through Nowra).

    • Great tips. Was meant to do a vision board…no idea where to start!

      • Maybe pop into KikkiK when you get a free moment and see if anything clicks with you. Otherwise maybe print out some happy photos. You know the ones that remind you of good times, great adventures, calm peaceful places and add those. Then think of your favourite books for quotes. Inspirational people. Use colours you love and make you feel happy and pop it in view of somewhere you like to relax with a cuppa and ginger nut.

  13. I am a fan of voodoo.
    Especially acupuncture and reiki.
    Eighteen months or so after I had C I was feeling so slow and low…acupuncture got everything going again and after few sessions I felt better than ever. Of course it could have just been the opportunity to lie in a quiet room, by myself, for an hour a week!
    I really want to see a psychic…one of my friends saw one here in Brisbane and her insights were incredible!

  14. Can’t say I’m into any of the alternative stuff, but that doesn’t mean I wouldn’t be willing to give it a go…I mean it can’t hurt right? Apart from the little needles…

  15. If I had the time acupuncture is my favourite.. total bliss.. I had it through both pregnancies x

  16. Lisa Mckenzie says

    I have tried tai chi,meditation and reiki and some other sort of massage I’m all for trying alternative therapies Beth ,I do hope you feel better but everything will come back to you ,I’m sure it will all be ok Xx

  17. Hi Beth – there’s a free app that was great when I was pregnant with my surprise fourth child. I still use it now as it is a great 10 min calming device when I’m overwhelmed with the busyness of life. It’s called Hypno 4 Birth and it’s great.
    I’m a psychologist so am all about the science but have had a crystal healing from my Reiki master sister that cured a very bad sore throat overnight so who knows??

  18. I’ve been using acupuncture throughout the IVF process and now my (very early stages of) pregnancy. It has been shown in research to improve chances of pregnancy and reduce risk of miscarriage – so I figured why not! I have tried kinesiology once, but I actually left there feeling a bit worse of emotionally than when I walked in! But I’d give it another go – I don’t mind a bit of voodoo 🙂

  19. Reiki, I attribute whatever it released to my getting pregnant the first time, second time it was a ‘ZZ top’ song Legs that we were rocking to… do whatever it takes to centre yourself.
    I ,for one ,am really looking forward to being introduced to this baby of yours via the blog.
    Best wishes, light and strength and love.

  20. I got a freebie voucher for a reflexology session a few months ago. It was heaven! Basically an hour long foot massage whilst lying back in a big squishy chair – win! But I felt seriously amazing for at least a week afterwards. More energy, more positive & just lighter, somehow. I should go back!

  21. I sure am open to voodoo, & also love The Labyrinth, but I didn’t feel like Kinesiology was for me. I came out feeling worse. The Kinesiologist dredged up emotional things that I didn’t even know I had a problem with. Perhaps it was the technician, but I haven’t been game enough to try it again. I do feel like I need something though. Some kind of tonic other than the one that accompanies gin. This post has reminded me that I really need to find some time for myself. Three beautiful cheeky monkeys under the age of 5 can take it out of you sometimes. Especially with the new attitudes that the cherubs have been bringing home from big school and preschool which they started this year. It will all fall into place once your beautiful bundle arrives.

  22. Yes done kinesiology. But prefer shopping and reading your blog. Goodness you are brave with this three thing. I would not ever have the guts to do that.

    Good luck. And I suppose the universe does not give you things you cannot handle.

    M

  23. The only way is through…hold on and enjoy the ride! Well…sob a little every now and then to relieve the stress…but just go with it. I have been right where you are and felt those feelings and they are very valid…each child adds and relieves burdens…it is quite amazing our power to adjust and grow…and growing hardly comes without a bit of suffering… at the least. You are right where you should be and that is a comforting thought isn’t it?! Someone once told me that each baby is born with a loaf of bread under it’s arm…it’s a great way to think of the things that a new baby will bring to sustain and energize the family it is born to…PLUS I have it on very good authority that third children are in fact the charm…mine has taught me soooo much about life and what you think you know but don’t…was even the sex I was scared of having and my goodness you couldn’t change that for the world on me now. I firmly believe all of these emotions beforehand have given us an incredible bond and myself an appreciation for life that I had never known. You are in the process of giving over to life’s strange and beautiful ways…surrender Dorothy…there’s no place like home…with 3 beautiful babes;) You will be awesome…sometimes you won’t…but mostly you will.

  24. I went to a Kinesiologist and it was a load of horse shit. She tapped on my wrist asking questions to no one in particular and was apparently getting answers back from just tapping. It did sweet FA. But I am open to try all things, so I have ticked that off my list. Wont be back.

  25. I reckon what gets you through the night (so to speak)!

    I’ve been thinking about this post a lot. I, too, have gone through down periods and have most likely been depressed (but undiagnosed too). Before Darbs was born I really didn’t know if I could do it all again, like really didn’t think I had it in me, but you know what in some ways it’s easier and it’s not as bad. Maturity? Knowing it won’t last forever? Something like that. The thing that has overwhelmed me with the third is just how much I’ve enjoyed it, like really enjoyed it. While there has been a lot more of a juggle, trekking out to school drop-offs and pick-ups with a newborn, the fact that life doesn’t come to a grinding halt like it does with number one and you have to get on with everything with the first two while dragging around poor number 3. In some ways it’s easier because you just don’t have time to think about it and ponder it, you just get on with it and freak out a little less. You actually enjoy that moment when you get to sit on the couch and breastfeed and watch a bit of telly too. He was a bad sleeper and I had some god awful days, but I knew we’d get through it. As he’s grown up there, of course, have been times when I’ve thought “Gosh, if I just had the two life would’ve been a lot simpler”, but the joy is amazing. I enjoyed soaking up the baby stage because I knew it would be the last time. Seeing the way the girls are with him blows my mind. Before I went to bed last night, I checked in on them all as I do every night and I was awash with these extreme feelings of love and joy as I saw him there fast asleep, snoring away (I’m fairly certain he has sleep apnea too, but we won’t go there today). I guess what I’m saying is, there will be tough days, but you already know that, it will be easier because your parent fitness is there, you’ve done it, you know what to do, you know what to sweat and what not to sweat about. Third time’s a charm. And the good times, oh my god the good times, will be all the sweeter.

    Sorry, I didn’t mean to write such an epic comment, but something struck a chord with me. xxx

  26. EFT is a life saver Beth. I dont have kids but came across it a few years back now and it takes just a few minutes to do to yourself. Similar to acupuncture without needles. Subtle shifts. Can practice it on yourself in moments of stress/sadness/anxiety /anytime really. Watch a you tube vid on it to get a feel. I have a few on my blog. Totally voodoo but it works!
    T x

  27. Wow. I love this hon – good on you. You make me want to go see All Of The Helpers for All Of The Things.

    xxxxx

  28. Hi there, I took my 8 year old daughter, who had alopecia, to a Kinesiologist after recommendation from a friend. I was so impressed I started going myself. 16 years later I started studying to become a Kinesiologist! I am a midwife and nurse so opposite ends of the medical spectrum, but it works, provides clarity and balance and gets to the cause rather than just addressing symptoms.
    I’m a nurse, midwife, reiki practitioner, aromatherapist and now a Kinesiologist.

  29. I know you wrote this post a long time ago, and I hope things are going well for you.

    I believe in crystal healing. When I was 13 I suffered a brain hemorrhage on my left frontal lobe, all very dramatic. Everyone told my parents that I had to have surgery, if I didn’t I would die, but if I did there was a very large risk I would still die or wake up permanantly disabled. Whilst waiting for surgery I was given some crystals by a family friend, including a large round rose quartz, I would hold this quartz until it was so hot it could burn.

    Long story short, I woke up from surgery, sat up and screamed for my Mum. A medical miracle! There were was no rhyme or reason for my great recovery but I’ve always believe it had something to do with those crystals.

    I use them less now I am older, but I still have a few near my desk to absorb negative energy and I still hold my lovely quartz ball for comfort.

    I believe what ever works for you is the best medicine xx

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  1. […] which is FINE, but also exhausting. Something has shifted in me this week (let’s blame the Kinesiologist visit) but in my new mantra of being OK with everything that happens…not getting […]

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