The first time

Rob was up in the big smoke last night catching up with his Dad when he sent me through a snap as he walked to the gallery he was headed. This was the place where we met the very first time. I first time I ever saw him walking, existing, laughing. The VERY first time. I have written about how we met before, we were set up by a mutual friend on a casual brunch situation. He made a joke about the ham and cheese sambo and BOOM! That was it.


I remember seeing him walk down the street towards us and I took in everything in a quick, calculated way. The way his t shirt was frayed, the cargo pants with spilling contents, the long, curly hair wet from the shower, the Chuck Taylor’s on his feet. I remember every single bit. We sat at the front there, my friend in the middle while we talked over the top of her.

The way we still talk over others to make each other laugh.

Man those first few months of being with someone that you love! They are something else aren’t they? All that SEX. Those pashes on street corners, at lights, at the table at the restaurant because you just couldn’t imagine NOT kissing them. Rob had a beautiful art deco apartment he lived in Woollahra and our days (in between work) were spent together. We went out to art galleries, saw movies, watched the Office in bed, drank champagne, read books, made up songs about our breakfast (to the tune of your song by Elton John): ‘It’s made with bacon, it’s made with bacon, cheese and tom-a-to, cooked under the griller, setting on low….” such wonderful, precious memories.

I love that that cafe is still there, going strong almost 11 years later (sometime around September 2003 it was I think?). We went there for a strawberry milkshake the day before we had Daisy and our lives changed forever. When it became not about him and I anymore, but US. What a thing! What a bloody privilege.

I love that man internet, him and his frayed t shirt and overflowing cargo pant pockets making a stupid joke about a ham and cheese sambo.

Tell me about the very first time you saw your love. THE FIRST TIME.
Do you remember what they were wearing?
What joke they made?

Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m off to listen to Roberta Flack.


  1. Tammy Glass says

    Love this !
    Made my pupils dilate and get that excited feeling in the pit of my stomach reading this !
    I like that you are a details person – me too !
    Great little post 😉

  2. Beth I was on a contiki tour to Scandinavia 27 years ago this month. We were waiting in the bus all set to go except for one late person. That person was the man I fell hard for the moment I saw him. Messy hair, green and black t-shirt, jeans and the biggest cheeky grin I ever saw. Not embarrassed at all that he had kept the whole bus waiting. He looked at me and winked and that was the beginning of this love story. Oh my god.

  3. Zadada an I were year 12 sweethearts! But I first layed eyes on him and had my first conversation with him in year 7 Ag class, so beautiful a conversation in a cabbage patch about our 2 baby sisters. Who would of thought we’d end up together 5 years later! Here we are now 18 years, 3 kidlets, 1 dog, 1cat, 25 head of cattle and 3 guinea pigs later and life has never been more fulfilling!! I just love him to bits. Thanks for making me think about it Beth! 🙂

  4. katie clews says

    Almost 10 years ago that we met (the 17th of this month) it was the day before his 29th Birthday.. .. we met on the internet can you believe it??? Mark was my last ditched attempt at internet dating. I swore that this was the last one, after a string of dodgy bastards/idiots/wankers.. I’d had enough!!! Anyway, we decided to go bowling with a couple of my friends.. So, we exchanged numbers the week before and set up a “date”.. He came over to my place, it was Friday afternoon (yes very big risk as he was off the internet and I really knew nothing about him).. I was renting a downstairs granny flat from a gay couple (we ended up moving from Brissie to Hervey Bay and these guys did too, so we are still great mates and see each other often)…. He came with overnight bag in hand (which was full of beer).. I first thought, wow you’re pretty confident we are going to hook up and you are going to stay the night!!! but then later realised it was beer.. Anyway, we had THE BEST time.. Drank, bowled, smoked a bit of pot (first time in many many years) jumped on my friend’s trampoline, laughed, gazed at stars …..and he stayed the night.. From that point on we were inseparable. Moved in together 6 months later, engaged 2 months after that, married 4 months after getting engaged…When you know, you know.. We will celebrate our 9 year wedding anniversary on the 10th of this month..Two children in that time…and I couldn’t ask for a better man.. we still make each other laugh, have fun and are best friends. I definitely love him more now than I did back then, and it just keeps getting better!!

    • That is just the BEST story Katie! What a ride! You sure do know…thanks for sharing!

    • I too met hubster on the internet ten years ago! He was also the last chance saloon of internet dating. He had a shaved head, was really skinny and had a hairy chest. That’s what I told my bestie in the date debrief. She told me not to repeat it because 1 day I might marry him. I told everyone. My bad because 3 months later we were living together, 2 years later we were married and we still laugh about the date debrief even now. Just another reason to love the inter webs!

  5. I’m pretty sure my husb and I fell in love over a shared love of croque monsieurs, big breakfasts with black pudding, coffee and a juice of the day in that very same cafe! I lived round the corner the other way in Paddo and the farmer would come to sydney to visit me and we would go to flat white for late brunches on Saturday AND Sunday then sneak past on Monday for takeaways as he drove me to work before heading home. Such happy memories!

  6. katie clews says

    oh, he wore a casual white Quiksilver t-shirt, jeans, scruffy curly hair, lots of freckles and cool skater shoes.. but he was SHORT.. yes, same height as me 160cm.. but I overlooked that and thank god I did 🙂

  7. It was probably about 1991. Ish. I was at swimming lessons at a local lady’s pool. He wore sky blue speedo’s. We were 5 years old.
    Thanks Mrs Cummings – we can both swim AND produce babies. Not at the same time though…

    • Thankfully! Were you really 5 in 1991?!!!

      • Errr…yes?

      • Actually the ‘real’ first time was more like September 2003, I’d just returned home from disastrous year at boarding school, had never noticed this tall lanky shy guy in my year but went on a school trip to Uluru with him and his mates, telling my mum not to worry because ‘all the boys going are super dorks’. I distinctly remember the first time I saw him, like REALLY saw him, walking up Stanley Chasm near Alice Springs, he was wearing a green Kathmandu tshirt, cargo shorts and hiking boots, and a super dorky bucket hat. We held hands at sunset at Uluru, kissed on Glenelg beach on the way home in Adelaide and have been inseparable ever since. When we were working on a cattle station in outback Queensland a few years ago he burnt a hole in the green Kathmandu tshirt when he was welding – and I cried about it. It’s funny the little things that we hold onto without even realising it. The first time I knew I’d spend the rest of my life with him was more like 2005 though in the first few weeks of living in Melbourne and going to uni, he rode his bike from his college to my little crummy flat in Richmond in the pelting rain because we missed each other, I remember opening the door and it hit me how much I loved him. Yup, that.

  8. How beautiful!
    I remember his long hair, coffee coloured skin, huge brown eyes. He was the prettiest thing I’d ever seen with such spark. I quickly suppressed those thoughts for a few years, but I’m glad he was around later when the time was right.
    We still make up songs too.

  9. Lisa Mckenzie says

    Beth this is beautiful ,yes I remember the first time I saw my love I was sitting on my parents side fence,picture it a corner block summer time and this guy walks past in his footy shorts and a tee and thongs I think with his boxer dog,he was pretty cute, so of course I patted his dog and we went out after that.I love the early days do kissing and the excitement of it all.We have been married 29 years last April x

  10. Yup. I remember!
    We were at a mutual friends birthday at the Cross. He was stuck outside because there was a stabbing downstairs in the club we were at and the cops had stopped people entering. He was wearing a red Adidas track suit (it was a track suit party!). There was his happy smiling face waving up to me on the balcony. Ahhh memories!

  11. Dave and I met …. through mutual friends. I heard him before I saw him. All he talked about was his children this, his children that. I thought, jeez, that guy sounds more ocker than Steve Irwin and that guy LOVES his children.

    I looked up to the voice. He was wearing the overalls he always wore back then, very light khaki green overalls but with only one strap done up, all cool-like. He WINCES when I remind him. Weeks later I was out on my verandah having a ciggie and he drove past and waved and STOPPED and I was all, GREAT. That fucking builder knows where I live now. He came in and I made him a cup of tea. He surprised me with his heart, and his passion for retro stuff. I surprised him by telling him it didn’t bother me in the slightest that he had kids. (He never thought he would be with anybody else again, because he already had three kids.)

    We were friends for MONTHS before consummation. Went to a fancy dress party, he was a viking and I was Roller Girl, chain-smoking, gliding around with long legs on rollerskates.

    I will love that cocksucker forever.

    I like your ham and cheese story and remember how it was all written fancy on the menu. Pretty sure when you leant over to Rob and said, “That’s just a fucking ham and cheese sandwich” – pretty sure that’s when he fell for you.


  12. Oh how I wish I do remember the joke as it was a pivotal part to us actually meeting. I was at Uni at the time and taking a photography subject that required me to take portraits of local identities. There was a man who used to frequent the Townsville CBD holding a sign that said “3 Jokes for $1” – I loved everything about him and had my heart set on submitting his photo. Only he went AWOL. I didn’t see him again for weeks and had to pick someone else for my photo essay.

    So one night I was out with a friend walking out of an Irish pub AND THERE HE WAS. I actually fell down the steps in my excitement to see him and gushed over him for awhile before the cute blonde guy standing with him interjected and bet me a beer he could tell a funnier joke. Well. Obviously Nick couldn’t because you know, the “3 Jokes for $1” guy was a professional. But I got a beer and we really hit it off.

    Despite that, somehow in the division of friends I was paired with the guy he was with and my friend was paired with Nick. Nothing ended up happening on either side. About 3mths later I ran into Nick again in the same bar and we exchanged numbers and had a bit of a “textual relationship” texting and calling and being friends for another month or two before finally hooking up. Monday was our 6th anniversary xx

  13. His little sister joined our netball team and I locked eyes with him post match, feeling really attractive as a sweaty red faced 21 year old. He was wearing a tan Hugo boss jumper and jeans. He always tells the story that he saw me the week before but I didn’t see him and he thought “I have to meet that girl”. Hahaha

    Nearly 10 years on, married for nearly 5 years, tree changed from Melbourne to the surf coast, 3 kids and another on the way. Even if you paid me a million bucks I would never have guessed that we would have ended up where we are. We have made such a beautiful family and life together. Still love him like I did when we first met.
    Thanks for making me stop amongst the chaos and realise how special that is.

  14. Just waiting for someone to ask for the rights to our story, to use for a midday movie or mills and boon novel. Twelve long years ago I was stunning young 20 old and working in Japan. I often frequented a bar with work colleges, several nights in a row there were only 2 English speaking people left, me and a scruffy ginger head gent from England. He kept talking about his mum, alternating chain smoking and eating meatballs. He told me he hated blonde mouthy Australians (would say that is a very apt description). After several months of this we both missed the last train and been together ever since.
    He is now a teetotaller vegetarian, and I am the same.

  15. All that pashing alright – I MISS IT. Mine lived in Manly and we used to walk along the beach so much, talk shit and waste hours looking at each other! Oh the good old days. x

  16. I was 16, he was 17. He came with a friend to pick me up from school because apparently my friend had been telling him he liked me & he wanted to see if I lived up to the hype ( he tells me I did).
    That was 19 years ago 🙂

  17. It was new years day 1990 & it was really hot. I was gingerly lowering myself into the local swimming pool trying not to squeal as the icy water hit my tummy. I was wearing an orange bikini with black polka dots. Suddenly someone jumped in right near me sending cold water splashing all over me. As he surfaced he noticed what had happened & came over to say sorry & happy new year. We stood in that same spot talking for hours until the pool closed & then he asked me if I wanted to go to the movies that night with him. We married in November 1991 & the rest as they say is history 🙂

  18. My husband and I met at Sydney airport. We were part of a group heading to Vanuatu for a mutual friends wedding. I literally fell into his arms as we were introduced and he caught me. It was the next night at a local pub in Vanuatu where I remember standing in line with him at the bar, he said something funny, he really made me laugh and BOOM! I knew right then and there, 24 hours after falling into his arms that I was going to marry him.

  19. I met my husband on a blind date at the same bowling alley that my Mum and Dad met! Three gorgeous kids later plus many more adventures here we are celebrating 11 years of marriage on Saturday. Love of my life!

  20. We met at the Casino in Perth in the Cabaret lounge bar, 15 years ago! Martin Plaza from Mental as Anything was performing and the guy who fronted the band 1927 (What was his name….Eric?) My Husband was out with mates dressed in identical Hawaiian shirts, don’t ask 🙂 I was with a girlfriend and my Husband stepped back onto my foot, turned around and said sorry. He then turned back around and started talking to us. We had a great night and after taking my number, he called 2 days later. We’ve been married for nearly 13 years.

  21. In my flat in London, he was five years younger than me and had dreads. Talked myself out of liking him for so long until the usual one drunken night… then talked myself out of the relationship until he went back home for a visit to NZ and didn’t call me! When he came back I was dating someone else (well two dates), he called me up and we talked for 8 hours overnight on the phone. Gave in to the young bunny with dreads and we have been together over 10 years and two kiddies.

  22. I was invited to a friend of a friend of a friend of a friend’s housewarming party. It’s was HIS and his girlfriend’s housewarming. They had a little kitten which ran past as I was introduced to him and we spoke for literally five minutes about the kitten. I don’t remember much about what he looked like or was wearing but I definitely remember thinking, ‘WOW, that girl is so LUCKY’. We saw each other now and then at other parties after that, then years later (when he was single ;)) we ended up opposite each other at a dinner party. We’ve been inseparable since. 😉 oh and we still have the cat!

  23. Rach aka stinkb0mb says

    I met Guv 3 weeks after I arrived in London via the Internet. Back then it was AOL and you could search for users and message them. I searched for people in Manchester [where my parents and the rest of my family are from] and his name popped up in the list – Motleyboy69 – and something made me click on it.

    We talked online everyday for about 2 weeks and then he rang me. I could not understand ONE word when we first spoke, he had the thickest northern English accent I’d ever heard and I’ve heard some heavy accents! We spoke on the phone every day for weeks exchanged pictures and then we organised for him to come down to London for the day/night. I went to meet him at Euston station in London and waited for him on the platform – he walked straight past me! He told me later that he saw me but thought “no she’s not that good looking” [instant brownie points, though in fairness, the photo I had sent him wasn’t overly flattering!]. We spent the day together and he went back to Manchester the next day. At one point during that day, I actually remember stopping and looking at him and thinking “can I see myself spending the rest of my life with this man?” – freaky!

    We started officially dating just after Christmas, 2 weeks later he asked me to marry him. 11 months after meeting we were married.

    People were critical of the age difference [we’re 10 years apart], the speed of which we got together and of how we met. I’m happy to report, that all those people who were critical of us, we not only proved them wrong – 15 yrs together and married for 14 yrs this year but we also OUTLASTED every single one of them and their relationships.

    We’ve had our ups and downs but we’ve survived it all and now are more in love than ever. When you know you know and as long as you know, stuff what anyone else thinks.

  24. Funnily enough I met my husband at our part time job whilst we were at school, I was told by the Manager we had a new guy starting about my age and I joked that I hope he was boyfriend material. I still remember the day he came in before his first shift. We will soon be together 10 years

  25. In 2006 I agreed to go on a fun girls night out to a D&D ball. I was SO not interested in a relationship after finally calling it quits with my ex but was badgered by the girls to fill in the few questions required to be set up with a date so I did. Two days before the ball I received a text asking if I wanted to meet my date for a drink before the ball. I agreed to meet AT the ball and would have one drink with my date to be polite. We had that drink. And a few more. We married 4 years later and now have two mini-me’s running around.

  26. Kirsty Michalzik says

    Love this post! LOVE.

    My husband and I both arrived at Blamey Barracks, the Army Recruit Training Batallian on the same day. He from Perth and I from the Central Coast of Queensland.

    We met properly for the first time at the Kapooka hospital. I had whooping cough and he had influenza. We were both wearing surgical masks.

    He approached me and asked if I had come from his “sister Platoon” which I did. I had already been in hospital for a few days. I asked him what I had missed in our training. He proceeded to attempt to demonstrate and explain “drill with arms”.
    I had no clue. I just nodded.

    When we were both released from hospital we were then both placed into the same Platoon, in the same 8-person section!

    We spent the following 80 days living together and learning to be Soldiers together.

    Following our training, we stayed in contact almost every day. I flew to Perth to spend time with him at his parent’s place for a week.

    8 months later we were both posted up to Townsville, which is so lucky. What’s even luckier – we were posted to the same Regiment.

    We promptly moved in together, got engaged, got married and now we have an 18 month old daughter. It’s our 4th Wedding Anniversary in a couple of weeks.

    I love him more and more each day.

  27. The best of relationships always start over a joke. This is a classic!
    Johnny and I met in London, at around 11.30am on a Sunday at a very seedy establishment. We joked how we thought the mothers of the girls flashing their tits on the stage in front of us must have been proud! TRUE STORY!
    I don’t think we’ll be taking our kids there to show them where we met!

  28. aww these are so lovely. I love romantic stories. My husband used to be a brit pop rocker back in the day. He was touring Australia and I went to see him perform. Thought ‘oh he’s cute’ and after the gig we hit it off. One thing led to another and he moved to Australia a few months later to be with me. We’ve been married nearly eight years and now live in Germany together.

  29. We met when he was working as a waiter at my friend’s dad’s restaurant. I hung around after my friend finished work and had drinks with a group of people who worked there. I ended up challenging him to a drinking competition (class-ay!).
    Over the next two months we kept running each to each other. And he asked me out on a date. Bought a bottle of my favourite wine at the time (Rosemount Chardy) and when the rose lady came around at the restaurant he bought every single rose the lady had (class-ay). He made me laugh and lent me ciggies. 17 years, three kids later and here we are.

  30. The first time I met my husband, I was still living with my (now) ex-boyfriend, but it didn’t stop me from noticing him. I remember looking at him, his shoes (white adidas trainers with blue stripes) then thinking to myself – that is the best looking guy I’ve ever seen! He is now the most incredible father to our 2 children, still the most wonderful husband and I still think he’s the best looking guy I’ve ever seen. I’ll tag you in my most recent Instagram pic of him, because it was about this very thing… How wonderful he is!

  31. I met my now husband on a girls weekend away, flew to Melbourne from Sydney Friday arv straight after work, to meet my best friend that had relocated there, she was late as usual, sent her new boyfriend to pick me up, he bought a friend with him for the drive. I remember exactly what he was wearing, they way he smelt (acqua de Gio, and he isn’t allowed to wear anything but now), but what remember most was how bright green his eyes were and how tall he was…
    We spent the weekend together, wandering around the lane ways of Melbourne, drinking coffee (Laurent was our first official date the next day) and falling in love.
    Nearly 5 years later, married, 3 beautiful daughters and living in Cairns!

  32. Ooh I got tingles reading this! Love it. I met my husband at the pub that is now our local – I feel like we’ve come full circle. We met in the suburb we now call our home as a married couple 10 years later. He was wearing jeans and a grey Diesel jumper. He ordered a chicken burger and chips and I paid him out for not wanting to eat the chips (he’s still a carb-o-phobe to this day). I thought he was a deadsest spunkrat then and I think he’s the sexiest most handsome guy on the planet now. x

  33. Yep, it was Edinburgh Scotland 2006, he was the hostel receptionist, I was the backpacker, he told me a joke.
    Ask me if I’m an orange?
    Are you an orange?
    Married and 2 daughters later, I sometimes think he’s funny 🙂

  34. I’m still waiting for my experience of this. I’m divorced and have two gorgeous kids but I was with the wrong man the entire time. All of these stories made me smile. It can happen anywhere, anytime, anyplace x


  1. […] I love making birthday cakes and I’ve probably made that clear here, here and here. The only thing better than making a birthday cake for someone is watching your husband make a birthday cake for you!! Love your work and you Zadada!!! Who would have thought all those years ago in year 7 Agriculture class when we were having our first ever conversation as classmates, standing in a cabbage patch, talking about our baby sisters, that you would be here now making me my 36th birthday cake with 10 years of marriage, 3kidlets, 1 dog, 1 cat, 25 head of cattle and 3 guinea pigs under our belts. Not me in year 7 that’s for sure!! I just love when you can stop and reflect about the good things in life. The gorgeous Babymac (one of my favourite bloggers) got me reflecting on Wednesday with a great post here! […]

  2. […] post was inspired by the ‘when we first met’ story shared here by my birthday twin Baby Mac. Her story has a bit more nookie in it than […]

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