How do you see yourself?

Last week I went to a PR event for the French author Mireille Guiliano who was out promoting her new book French Women don’t get Facelifts (she previously wrote French women don’t get fat). This teeny tiny woman was as fabulous as you would imagine a French woman to be – a perfectly manicured Anna Wintourish short bob, stylish little glasses placed just so on her head, a beautiful voice with an accent to die for, class, glamour and grace oozing out of her pores. She also had on this fabulous outfit, a little crazy, definitely European and she looked amazing. I told her so, took a snap of her and whacked it up onto Instagram which fed through to Facebook and Twitter.


Boy did her outfit ruffle a few feathers. I know the pants wouldn’t be for everyone, but there were all kinds of words used to describe them but the most common were: fucking and ridiculous. Sheesh, tough crowd. Easy enough for us all to sit back on our phone or laptop and throw out a quick one liner. Jesus, I am the queen of these kinds of lines but I must say I was a bit surprised at the pace and venom. In any case, I don’t suppose the opinions of us would concern Mireille very much as she goes about her business making millions, being fabulous and well-balanced with her diet as she leads a hugely successful life living between her apartment in the West Village of NY and Paris.

Funnily enough, on the way up to Sydney the day before I was listening to Lisa Wilkinson discuss her Andrew Olle lecture that she gave on the previous weekend discussing women in the media (you can listen to it here). She discussed lots of issues but did talk a lot about how often her outfits and appearance are mentioned. How men and their appearance or age is never mentioned, and yet if a female is being profiled her age will always be mentioned, her outfits are up for opinion, her hairstyles discussed. I am to blame for this to, I will be the first to comment on someone’s outfit when they are on TV…not to mention myself when I sit back and cringe at my lack of neck, 54 chins or guts sticking out over the desk when I’m on The Daily Edition just once a week (thank goodness).

Then a day or so later I was on Instagram when a lovely lady whacked up a snap of herself when she was 16. She looked AMAZING. Young. Carefree. Gorgeous. And I commented to her that I bet she thought she was fat at the time right? And she said yes! Didn’t we all do that? Don’t we all do that? I found this photo this morning:


Attractive isn’t it? It’s me. Aged 13 I think. Look at those legs! So young! So taut! So shy! Whilst the flanno is questionable, at the time I still thought I was fat. A bit ugly. Who didn’t when they were 13? I bet my Mum told me I was beautiful every single day. Wished I’d listened. Dear GOD I hope my girls listen.

My silly little hashtag of calling myself a fat mole is tongue in cheek. Of COURSE I know I’m not a fat mole. I’m certainly carrying extra guts at the moment. I see them when I avoid looking in a full length mirror when I jump in the shower, or do up my jeans. Winter was good to me and my guts. And now I’m trying to budge them, get moving again – mostly for my mind which feels better and deals so much better with EVERYTHING when it’s moving. But I am harsh on myself. And others.

Why? Why do we do it?

What is it about women that makes us look at the stretch marks as being ugly rather than as a reminder of when she managed the miracle of growing an ACTUAL PERSON in our stomach? What makes us talk about someone’s outfit rather than what they have to SAY? Or judge someone on their choices, or life? Why do we apologise for our bad hair that needs doing, or un made up face? To make us feel better do you think? I don’t know the answers…I am guilty of all of it. I do it to myself, and others, every day. Human nature? Boredom? Feeling bad about ourselves? Or just part of being a woman?

While this is how I sometimes portray myself (DAMN this was a good selfie thank you channel 7 make up and Instagram filters) because it makes me feel good about myself, and it’s nice to feel good about yourself right?


This is actually how I look.


And you know what? I like the second one better. I suppose in 10 years time from now, when I’m even fatter, and even less concerned about other people’s opinion that I’ll look back on now and think I looked pretty good. Yes, even those guts hanging over the top of my jeans, those stretch marks all over my stomach.


It’s time to start listening right now, instead of looking back.  Time to stop judging others. I mean WHO REALLY CARES? It’s not like we are changing the world with our own fashion choices every day is it?

This post is all over the place I know, a vomit of thoughts and pictures not really knowing what it wants to say, but there’s something here.


How do you see yourself when you look in the mirror? Tired? Old? Beautiful? Happy? For me? Well, I see a Mum. A wife who could try harder. A body that is underworked. A content, happy and extremely lucky woman who is starting to care less and less about what the fuck anyone thinks of me. And hoping that I can start to do the same when I look at others.

What do you see?
How do we stop ourselves from giving a shit about what other people do?
Why are women such complex creatures?

You can upload a photo if you’d like? See that little picture icon in the comment box? Snap away! 


  1. Lisa Woolf says
  2. carohutchison says

    I’m quite deluded I think, I look a lot better in my mind than I do in the mirror. Having spent six years in a house without a full length mirror I got quite a shock when we moved and I could actually see the size of my bum. It’s not the same as it was before three kids came along.
    My son told me the other day that my tummy was soft and squishy, and I replied yes, just like a balloon, when a woman has a baby in her tummy it gets tight and round like a balloon. Once the baby’s out, then it goes a bit like a balloon that’s a couple of days old, smaller and wrinkly. And you can never get that balloon back to how it was at the start. 🙂

    • BabyMacBlogBeth says

      Deluded is a good place to be when it comes to body image…I’m with you! I love your balloon metaphor!

  3. Chelsea Sutherland says

    I always see frown lines & my lazy eye! I’ve lost a fair bit of weight over the last two years and am growing to like my body more – but can still be pretty mean to myself on a bad day!

  4. twopointfivekids says

    Love love love this post 🙂

  5. Bree Di Mattina says

    How did you get a picture of my belly? They do say that the best thing you can do for your children is to love your spouse and yourself. Not to bang on about how fat you are or how you need to lose weight etc in front of them. And I totally agree. I know I could lose some weight but I don’t need to discuss it with my kids hubby for that matter. And I love your hair so much better now than the bob. So glad you changed your profile pic 😉

    • BabyMacBlogBeth says

      Ha! I wish all the females (including myself) would stop mentioning fat around my girls…all of a sudden I am SO conscious of it.

  6. Lisa Mckenzie says

    I see in the mirror a middle aged,a bit of a tummy,a few lines and depends on what day of the week,if my hair is good or not,just me! I often catch sight of myself walking past a mirror and I think holy shit is that me ,cause age is creeping up I will be 50 next week I know where has the time gone,in my mind I am like 25 or something and when I catch the glimpse of the real me sometimes I shudder.I dress nicely I will admit that cause I feel better if I look better and I get heaps of compliments on my style ,even the parcel lady said the other day,you always look nice and coordinated and you always smell nice( I am a perfume whore) I really am trying to accept this is what I look like and I will live with the little tummy and the wrinkles and make the most of what I’ve got,I can’t do exercise like normal people cause of a bad knee ,lots of operations and a knee replacement that was not quite a success and now my hand has gone bung on me ,my wrist and fingers are full of arthritis and swelling.I am going to just suck it up and be thankful I have not got anything life threatening.I see you Beth as an attractive young woman who is so confident looking,and you look Hot in Pics I have seen on IG and your blog ,I will never slag off another woman ,if you have nothing nice to say say nothing at all!

    • BabyMacBlogBeth says

      Good on you Lisa…I could take a leaf out of your book! You are the kindest person (or have been to me)…I KNEW you would smell nice and fancy!

      • Lisa Mckenzie says

        Thankyou Beth you are gorgeous inside and out and yep you only have one life so try and make the best of it.I would like to be remembered for being kind xx

  7. Michelle Buckland says

    Thank you Beth, this post made my day and is timely for me… just yesterday my mum gave me my old school photos from kindergarten right through to year 12. I hadn’t seen them in nearly 20 years. In my mind’s eye I was not an attractive child or teenager mostly because of the bullying I received on and off over the years. Boys calling me “ugly” and “box head”. I got such a shock to see what a pretty, healthy, sparkly looking girl I was, and my year 10 portrait, by which age I was convinced I was hideous, was just beautiful. I want to go back and tell that girl how lovely she really is.

    • BabyMacBlogBeth says

      Oh Michelle…that makes my heart ache. If only she knew indeed, what did those stupid boys know anyway? x

      • Michelle Buckland says

        I love the photos you posted here. I clearly remember how friendly and natural your face looked at uni and you haven’t changed much at all. It is a breath of fresh air to see natural faces and bodies as an antidote to the daily saturation of cosmetically, surgically and digitally enhanced ones. BUT natural-looks aside, I say a little thank you to you in my head most days because you put me onto Benefit’s Gimme Brow. I’d never heard of it and holy shit that stuff is amazing! x

  8. Lets start a new hashtag on IG then… maybe #iliketherealme or something… and we upload pictures of ourselves, sans make up, or our “ugly features” or most hated body parts etc. Teach ourselves, and others, that not one of us is the same, and some of us do have an overhanging belly, or a pointy nose, or no eyebrows. But that we should love it and love each other. Good on you beth!

  9. I’ve been having a ‘blah’ moment for too long now – too fat, too shy in my personal life, too over confident in my work life, their marriage is better than mine, she has better friends than I do, thank god that not my friend, nothing good ever happens, blah blah blah until yesterday after the melbourne cup when I actually said out loud ‘ for fucks sake woman! Sort your shit out!’ And so today that is what I’m doing, sorting my shit. I’m writing lists of what I see as good and bad in my life, what i can change now, what I can work on for that change to happen and where I need help. It’s not easy and there have been a few tears already this morning as I realize how selfish I’ve been in a lot of aspects but at least I can say I’m improving and hopefully on my way to being a nicer person. It’s fricking hard work being a grumpy old mole. I’d rather can the whingeing and the bitching and enjoy the laughs and celebrate people.
    Still got a long way to go before I can look at my 13 year old self with out a cringe tho! 🙂

    • BabyMacBlogBeth says

      Here’s to a new Liz…good luck!! Time spent laughing (even at ourselves) has to be better than being a grumpy old mole right? xx

  10. shoppegirls says

    Wow! I certainly wish I was there to meet Mireille Guiliano. Jealous much. I would say that I think you look fabulous. Age is a funny thing isn’t it and as you get older you learn to love who you are and what you look like. Thank you for sharing yourself with us.

  11. Jay - Moodie Foodie says

    I know what you mean Beth. Every night I get up, go to the loo and give myself self talk about how good (or not) I’ve been with my eating and exercise that day. EVERY NIGHT! What’s with that?!?! I’m constantly telling my girls how beautiful they are and how they shouldn’t judge themselves the way they do (at 12 and11 they do!) and yet I do it myself (although very rarely in front of them). Maybe we’re born with it? I LOVED your post, it’s made me rethink a whole lot. I can’t promise the self talk will stop tonight on the way to the loo, but I’m damn sure going to try xo

  12. Looks like my belly! Sometimes I hate it but most of the time I’m so proud that I grew 3 babies in there, the last one being 4.5 kg!
    Sometimes I look back at photos and feel a yearning for my smooth flat stomach, but on the whole I’m feeling pretty good about myself.
    Aren’t the teenage years just so hard though? I spent many a night crying over my thick glasses and braces but I was like the ugly duckling that turned out ok in the end.
    And now I don’t really think about what other people think of how I look, My husband and kids tell me I’m beautiful, and when I look in the mirror my face looks more interesting somehow than it did 15 years ago.

    • BabyMacBlogBeth says

      I can’t say I’m looking forward to the teenage years with the girls…ready to embrace it and all that it holds but I’m nervous!

  13. Gibbergunyah says

    Fab post Beth; tummies that have held babies and faces that tell a story are undervalued. Not least by those who have them, me included.

  14. Emily @ The Beetle Shack says

    Beth, you are SO fabulous. I’m with you, I do the whole self deprecating thing in jest- I know i’m not the fattest ugliest thing to walk planet earth but i’m certainly not the slimmest hottest either. I’m dead average (with a glass eye).

    I wish I loved myself more when I was 23. I hope my daughters do and I guess that starts with me NOT calling myself fat and ugly.

    but between you and I, I see that gut and I raise you double.

    em x

  15. Happyeverafter_Bride says

    I think this is a gorgeous article. I wouldn’t change myself and I don’t kid myself that I am more beautiful than the next woman, but you are right. I will never be this young or perky again so I might as well enjoy the skin I am in. And wear whatever I say is appropriate for me, because if it is young for me today, well it’d be too young for me tomorrow anyways…

  16. Kirsty Michalzik says

    I loved reading through the comments when you posted the picture of the amazing french woman! Hilarious!
    But seriously, I always smile when I see someone in a bold and edgy outfit because I think they’re either carefree or brave or both. Wish I could be a little more carefree.
    I do like what I see in the mirror, even my million and one stretchmarks! 🙂

  17. Great post, as a mum to 4yo twin ID girls I worry about this all the time as they will always compare themselves to each other, as will others. I am conscious about not talking about appearance in front of them but they are already showing signs that they are conscious of it.

    Body image is a big issue and one that won’t be going away the only thing we can do is prepare our children for it and set a good example.

    Since my girls were 2 I have been making an effort to include health and fitness in our lives and I think it’s paying off, I am fitter and healthier than I have ever been and that makes me feel confident about my body and in turn as a mum.

    • BabyMacBlogBeth says

      Rob and I try to do that so they know that exercise is part of life if you want to be healthy. Leading by example ALL the time – not just fad diets. It’s bloody hard work but so important.

  18. Emma Steendam says

    THANK YOU BETH! Thank you for being brave, and real. I consider myself extremely lucky – I’ve never had body issues, people don’t believe me, but there it is. And I honestly don’t know the secret, but it probably has something to do with my mum. She didn’t tell us girls that we were beautiful constantly, nor did she say we weren’t. She simply said nothing, she let us figure it out. When I was about 14 she gave me Kaz Cooke’s Real Gorgeous, silently, leaving it in my bedroom one day. I think it also has to do with finding the love of my life at 16, a powerful very real boom-boom love despite our age. Yes, that’s probably helped enormously. He tells me daily, probably multiple times, that I am beautiful. Unconditional love from a young age from the opposite sex I think has shaped the way I see myself. I’ve never even considered myself fat, or ugly, nor stunningly beautiful, I just am. Today that’s clean hair but thrown into a boring pony tail un-blowdried, it’s hairy eyebrows and pimply skin, no make-up and broken capileries on my nose and sunspots on my chest. Tomorrow it might be worse, or better, but there it is anyway. I don’t see the point in wasting my time and energy in anything else.

    • BabyMacBlogBeth says

      Gorgeous! Thank you for sharing x I hope my girls get a good dose of country common sense growing up and they really don’t care. Man, to NOT care! x

      • Emma Steendam says

        Yes YES! It’s that too. Country people. My mum is so no-nonsense, I think that’s it. I noticed a huge difference when I went to boarding school in Melbourne at 15.

  19. If only we saw ourselves through our husbands eyes. Phil, and I’m sure Rob does this to you too, tells me I’m beautiful every single day and 9 times out of 10 I brush him off with a ‘no I’m not’. How stupid! Meanwhile I trawl trough old skinny photos of myself as I get more and more pregnant rather than just trying to enjoy this new phase. So so silly.
    Great thought provoking post Betty!

    • BabyMacBlogBeth says

      Oh indeed…embrace that body baby…it won’t be like that ever again (it changes with each baby) so soak it up!!

  20. I love this so hard. I see a bit of a tired, worn-out, pale gal who just got a fabulous haircut. No matter that there’s weetbix in it. She’s happy. Just tired. I read one of Mireille’s books many years ago and wanted to get myself a bit of je ne sais quoi toot sweet.

  21. LOVE this post. I don’t mind how I look in the mirror (although I could do without the chin) but I do mind feeling old. I’ve felt a bit run down and ancient lately, but I’m looking forward to a girls weekend to put a bit or pep in my step. I blogged today about feeling old, so if you want to see possibly the worst selfie ever, pop on over.

  22. Littlesarah says

    I am nicer to other women than I am to myself. I am always comparing saying
    “If only I had her…” whatever I hate about myself that day. My
    husband will inevitably say ,you have a better bum, hair,
    skin, body (or whatever it is I’m whinging about) and I inevitably
    NEVER believe him. He loves me. He loves me exactly the way I am. I wish
    I could too 🙁

  23. Reannon Hope says

    Love love love this post! This is me. I see myself for who I am – a sleep deprived mama of three who despite living on minimal broken sleep for the past 6.5 months is happy & content. I see my lines , my bad skin & grey hair but I also see my sparkly eyes, a mouth that is always ready to smile, laugh, kiss or give a smart arse reply. I used to hate what I saw in the mirror but I’m ok with it now . I’m living a good life. I birthed three babies. I have good health & a body & mind that can do anything I want it too . What more could I ask for?!

  24. Mandi Jones says

    Up until just a few months ago I was all about the ‘I’m getting old, fat, wrinkly, hideous.’ Then I was diagnosed with breast cancer. I’m currently bald, down to just a few eyelashes, losing weight because of treatment and I don’t look like me at all. But I pop on my bright lippy and I smile at the world and I’m so damn proud of how hard I’m fighting that I forget to worry about my thighs or wrinkly eyes. My very gorgeous 8 year old daughter thinks my bald head is beautiful and I figure she thinks that because I project it. If I was crying about how ugly my bald head was she’d probably hate it. I really hope I can hold onto this new way of thinking once I’m all better and needing a haircut 🙂
    Sorry, this has all got very rambly but your post just struck such a chord.

    • BabyMacBlogBeth says

      Amazing Mandi! Good on you! I wish you all the best with your treatment, keep popping on those bright lips and being positive, you’ll get through the other side and teach a whole lot of people along the way about what REALLY matters. Me included. Thank you xxx

    • Lisa Aherne says

      I had breast cancer this year, diagnosed extremely early and I got off lightly. Of course I had surgery and radiotherapy, but was spared chemo and loss of hair. You have my admiration and respect. Attitude is everything and you have it in spades!

    • ahoy.jenni says

      I once read a story about a lady who was ashamed because she drove a beaten up old car and she used to park where people could not see the car she drove. Then she got cancer, and it changed everything. Now she says she tries to park right outside the party or restaurant she is going to meet her friends at. No more shame! Good luck with the rest of treatment.

  25. love this post Beth! I think it speak loud and clear to all of us! I uploaded a selfie – i think the first one i’ve ever taken solo – the other day because I looked hawwwwt on my way to Derby Day in the birdcage and i was wrapt with how I scrubbed up. But the other photo here is what I really look like. Right now! I think when we feel good about ourselves it’s great to share – and when we feel shit about ourselves, we should be allowed to share too! I too felt I was not the beautiful girl in high school, but i look back at photos now and think WTF??? lol

  26. good on you for writing this. off to read the comments now. I am a similar age to you with similar life experiences I think. Is it everyone or just our ‘group/age/city/media influence god knows.

    • BabyMacBlogBeth says

      Maybe everyone…maybe even worse for the younger generations given the social media/self promotion that wasn’t around when we were growing up. Or is it BECAUSE we didn’t have it that we embrace it so much? Who knows…!

  27. My husband walked away from 17 years together because I wasn’t good enough any more…. but then that started not long after we were married and I was 52 kilos. His mid-life crisis was about anything over 30 being too old – he actually said that out loud… has settled with someone 13 years younger and just had another baby as he approaches 50.
    The last 7 years of my life have been … lets just politely say.. challenging. But I am on the way up. Took the whole divorce settlement to invest in myself by starting an online business. Interestingly less than perfect bodies (sssooo like my own) was the inspiration. Quietly stressing that I am the only one who thinks like this and no-one else will ‘get’ my simple vision. Fingers crossed.

    Hopefully when this is up and running I can delve back in to dating. The problem is that a lot of middle aged men (like my husband) want to trade up… and they can, so the less than perfect specimens get overlooked. I was even told once by one that I wasn’t as advertised – despite having current photos and an honest profile. Do they all expect perfection, without any strings attached? just loads of sex? One guy said the younger, thinner, firmer booty call WAS fantastic but they roll over and had nothing to talk about. Hopefully some will realise that the older version can still be a sensible, sensual woman without a use by date regardless of a few rolls and wrinkles.

    • BabyMacBlogBeth says

      Thanks so much for your comment Amanda – bloody hell! Mid life crisis and dating…terrifying! I hope those men who trade up actually look around at the end of the day and realise that looks will only REALLY get you so far. Surely they realise that they need MORE than that?!! Humour, good company, enjoying mutual interests, art, food, good sex, ALL of that so much more important than looks.

      Good luck Amanda…somehow I think you will end up the richer, no matter the long journey for you to get there. Good luck xxx

    • Self love is the best! I am learning to love myself too, previously I knew nothing about it but have been learning lots about it on Melissa ambrosinis site- path to wellness. Wishing you much happiness xxxx

    • ahoy.jenni says

      Do the sums. When he is 70 with alzheimers and diabetes she’ll be in her 50’s. She may not want to hang around!
      Sorry I jest but I do believe what goes around comes around….

  28. I have said it before and I will stand on my soapbox (cause I am only 5 foot nothing and a half) and I’ll say it again. You are every kind of awesome! xx

    P.S This is me wrinkles wonky eyebrows and all x

  29. Naomi Tsvirko says

    “What is it about women that makes us look at the stretch marks as being ugly rather than as a reminder of when she managed the miracle of growing an ACTUAL PERSON in our stomach?” This resonates so strongly with me as I am pregnant with baby number two, you’re so right we should be more grateful and nicer to ourselves and others.

  30. At the moment I’m too tired to give a rats arse about how I look. I’m regularly covered in spew, haven’t worn makeup in months and my idea of doing my hair is putting it in a pony tail so the bub doesn’t swing off it. I have a beautiful wee boy, who is 5 months old today, I still have some jelly belly hanging about and I DON’T CARE! I’m happy, he is happy, the hubster is happy, that’s all that matters. If I have a bit of an overhang in my bikini I doubt either of my boys will point or even notice. If your nearest and dearest love you for who you are, why shouldn’t you love yourself too?
    Oh and I love the photos 🙂 good for you!

  31. Love this post, Beth.
    I have recently realised that no one gives a shit what you look like… They really only care what they look like. The realisation has changed my life!
    Keep on doing what you are doing. I think you are fab.

  32. Great post Beth. I was one who commented on those pants – I think I called it a skirt with legs (skleg) which I’m sure is big on the catwalk. As you said, each to their own 🙂
    I’ve been seeing my body in a different way now – it is stronger than I’ve ever expected it would be. The other day I ran 2 km without stopping. 2 km! Since this excercise, my skin has been so radiant. I’m very proud of what my body can do.
    I’ve written a lot about appearance and often said to never apologise for the way you look. Just be you, and love that.

    • BabyMacBlogBeth says

      You look so beautiful Carly! Happy and confident! You are the Queen of self acceptance…we could all take a leaf out of your book. Well done on the exercise! x

  33. SO well said Beth, I love it! It’s amazing how much my world changed when I stopped worrying about what other people thought of me and more about what I think of myself. It hasn’t made me any less shy or confident around new people but I;m not worrying about what they might think of me anymore because I am pretty damn happy with who I am and I’m not changing myself to fit anyone else’s criteria that’s for sure 🙂

    I think it’s kind of a circle, when worry less about what other people might think of us then we are far more open and accepting of differences (personalities, points of view, etc) and less likely to judge others ourselves. I guess it’s something that comes with age and maturity. I like this mid 30’s thing of not really giving a fuck what anyone else thinks of me lol…and I love that I am developing a really diverse and wonderful group of friends as a result.

    I love the photo of you aged 13…I have a similar one, I’m dancing in my nighty with it caught up on my booty a little…a few years later I decided I was fat too and that ruled my life for too many years. I am determined that I will not let it happen to my daughters. T xx

    • BabyMacBlogBeth says

      I think you might be right about that circle, the better we feel about ourselves the better or less concerned we are about what others think of us. The old negative nancies of the world feel pretty bad about themselves I think x

  34. Thanks Beth for your post and true words. We women are so hard on ourselves on each other. Women need to join forces and unite in kindness to change the world for our children. I also thought of myself as fat at 13 and still do at 39 yet I am smart and now work as a biologist so it is time to grow up and start adoring myself. I just travelled over 22 hours on a long distance bus with my partner to a confrence yesterday. I felt fat and old yet I am blessed I have my Aussie man by my side who has travelled half way around the world with me to support me as a scientist. He also came with me to the conference, I know no one here but I am glad he is here, spending time with me at night and he is by himself in this strange costal city where everyone speaks Spanish and he is exploring by day. I felt bloated and tired due to the bus trip, lack of sleep, preparations etc but what I want to say is i am blessed and life is a beautiful thing we should not take for granted. Australian women have it all ad should never take this for granted, they are beautiful, educated, smart any funny like you beth. Who cares if we have rolls on our tummy, I sure do even before I had 2 beautiful kidlets. We are who we are, and we should love who we are, we are here now living breathing and can change the world for future generations! End of rant…

  35. Lisa Aherne says

    I have a man who loves me and is in love with me. The feeling is reciprocated. We are not youngsters, rather mature aged. We consider ourselves to be lucky ‘kids’ to have met later in life and be so happy. I worry sometimes about the saggy bits and the wrinkles, he does not care one jot. What else matters? Really?

  36. Rebecca Mossuto says

    I see myself as an ugly, overweight & tired looking woman. I have three glorious children & one hot hubby but I just never feel ‘good enough’ I won’t look at my reflection for fear of what I see and hate my body even though I know how wonderful it has been to produce such beautiful children. I avoid having my photo taken although I will sit and take a selfie every now or then until I get the ‘perfect’ angle etc etc!! Why can’t I just be at peace with myself? It’s so draining having to worry about how we look all the time and being compared to others. Bloody high expectations out there that’s for sure! ! Thanks for your courage and honesty in writing your blog. It makes me smile every day xo

  37. Howdy! This is me reading you right now.
    As for how I see myself…pretty much exactly how I saw myself during the hardest time of my life – adolescence. I wore a back brace, had braces on my teeth, endured teasing, didn’t fit in to any one group of friends, the list goes on.
    But you know what?
    I may not have had any confidence in my looks back then, but I sure as hell had confidence in who I was on the inside.
    I still do.
    I’m also becoming more and more comfortable in my skin as the years pass.
    I like who I am.

  38. MotherDownUnder says

    I generally just think I look tired. And worn out. And like I am not trying.
    When I look back at photos of myself I think I look so fresh and so alive!

    And I remember spending hours in front of the mirror when I was about 16 convinced that I had cellulite…what a waste of time!

  39. I used to waste so much time, energy, and money on my appearance and trying to get my body to look a way that it is physically impossible to look. With age, and children, I’ve come to relax and accept it a lot more. Sure I’m not in physical peak condition, and I have certainly lost the discipline I once had with how I eat and exercise (something that I remind myself of daily!). But I’m happy, most of the time. What I’m concerned most about now is the way I talk about and portray my body, as my daughters are always listening. At times after a shower I’ll look down at my gut and want to grab it, jiggle it and make some disapproving noise, but my daughters are there watching, and listening. So I don’t.

  40. Whitney Sigler says

    Well this is me at 50 and @8am no make up. I really only wear bb cream eye concealer/liner and lipstick. I’m so hard on myself. Regarding :belly that’s gone south. The girls are still good (per hubby) 36DD lol. Thirty years ago next month we were married I was 120 5’51/2″ now I’m 160. Not to bad I guess after 6 pregnancies and 3 beautiful. Children. The hubby says I’m still beautiful. I need to stop looking at magazines.

  41. A couple of years ago I wrote on my bathroom mirror OMG!! you look amazing. Then I changed it to OMG!! You are amazing!
    Now I have added “and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise!”

    The older I get the less I care what other people think about me. If I’m not hurting anyone else, or myself, I do, wear, look, how I want to.

    I only wish that it hadn’t taken me to my 40’s to feel that way.

    Great post Beth. Keep it real.

    I’d take a photo but I’m laying in bed in the dark on my phone. 🙂

  42. As you know my brother committed suicide 3 weeks ago, I haven’t been able to eat much since then and as a consequence I’ve lost about 4 kilo’s and am the skinniest I’ve been in nearly 20 years – 60kgs! I just said this to a really good friend today that I’d rather be fat and have my brother than skinny and not have him…….. not that 64kgs is even fat, but when you’re as short as me there’s nowhere for extra kilo’s to go except my gut(s). Good on you for writing this and putting your guts on the internet and I tell you what, if you’re already feeling less and less like you give a fuck what people think of you at your age – you are gunna KILL your 40’s man xo

    • BabyMacBlogBeth says

      Beautiful Leigh, you have been in my thoughts SO much. Sending you love from my ample guts (and heart) xxx

  43. ahoy.jenni says

    You look like Edie Sedgwick in the glam shot. Know her? (she had a sad demise into drugs but hell she was groovy and cool in her time, used to hang out with Lou Reed, and all those other cool musicians in New York) I doubt you will go down the same path LOL.
    Well I just spent ages trying to take a picture on my bloody computer and it hasn’t worked so no shot of me tonight!
    And those pants are really bad I have to say! Just because she is French does not mean she should get away with it!

  44. I LOVED those pants. But as soon as I saw them I thought, uh oh, women are going to have a field day with that. I wish it was different. Maybe it will be. But only once people give up their right to think they can speak freely on another person’s choices. Especially their choice of FREAKING PANTS! Gosh.

    It’s taken almost 2 years of fashion blogging {yeah, I said it out loud, I never admit to fashion blogging} to really get over myself. Like really. I look at hundreds of photos of myself from every angle week after week. It desensitizes you I think and there’s peace in that. For me anyway.

    I no longer see the defects, the deficiencies. I just see me. Bold, brave, strong, ridiculous, fun and a whole person with thoughts and ideas doing my bit to make a difference and share some stuff I love. Me. Does that stop the sting when someone calls me a fat cow, ugly, stupid or makes some other attempt to shame me for MY choices, sometimes in entire why not to wear THIS type posts… No it doesn’t. The sting is still there. I think it probably always will be. And I’m glad, because it reminds me to not subject someone else to the same thing.

    Would you look at that. I made this all about me when really all I wanted to say was YES. Nice one Beth. Love your guts. And this time, it’s a literal thing.

    • BabyMacBlogBeth says

      Man you know I love your guts! I think you’re right, you have to be cut down a few times before you realise that it’s not a nice thing, and to change the view we judge others – getting a thick blogging skin isn’t such a bad thing is it? You are strong and confident and funny and an inspiration to many! x

  45. Catherine Seaton says

    I read this post after seeing Cherie’s (raising master max) Facebook comment, sounded good thought I would check in myself, did not expect to get so emotional over it! Thank you writing this we all need that reminder-might post note it all over my mirror/car/etc! Really Thank You x

  46. Beth! I love this – so very much. I’m going through all sorts of weird stages in my life at the moment, as a mother, as a wife and as my one self. Questioning everything I thought I knew and opening my heart to truths I need to admit.

    For a very long time I always believed that so long as I physically looked good and I was happy with what I saw in the mirror then I was ok with that. Now taking such an intense approach to my well-being, health and fitness all I want over the next year is to feel grounded and strong within myself first, so whatever decisions I make over the next 12 months how I see myself within will concern me more with how I see myself in the mirror – then everything else will radiate through to the exterior of me.

    I’m trying to starve my ego and feed my soul. And here’s a pic of me now – as I type this – fresh from a shower. You’re such an awesome woman – I find a lot of encouragement and inspiration from your writing. XXX

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