I totally forgot how revolting two can be. The age that is. Like the first contraction on your second labour, it all comes flooding back…oh yes, this. Harper is now a few weeks shy of being two and a half. That’s the pain of two, with an extra half of urgh thrown in. Now Sandra, before you tell me I am a terrible mother for saying stuff like this, I will say that it’s not her, it’s the age. See? Daisy was just as revolting at the same age.

The tantrums.
The rollercoaster of emotions.
The tantrums.
The stubbornness.
The determination.
The tears, oh my stars, the tears.
The fighting.
The poor sleeping.
The overtiredness.

But worse than all of this is the play whinging and crying. Do you know of this phenomenon? Harper started it a few weeks ago as she was playing with her dolls, or barbies or something. She plays out all the emotions that she is going through, but through the toys. So the toys cry, and whinge, and cry and have fights with each other. I’m sure this is some kind of developmental breakthrough, but I like to think of it as the world’s most annoying developmental breakthrough. I half listen from another room and when I think I can’t take it anymore rush in to try and put out the fire. Only to see that it’s an imaginary fire. So yes, there’s that.

She is doing so much better since her operation though. Her sleeping is much better. Is she sleeping through the night? Notsomuch. But she is sleeping without snoring, and that’s something. She is really loving having Daisy at home every day because of the holidays even if it means that I am putting out fires all day between them. As much as they fight, they do adore each other and are firm friends which is a joy to watch.

So, two. I’m happy to say that in 6 months time we won’t be seeing you again anytime round these here parts. You are a delight, and a frustration all rolled into one big ball of tantruming joy. And somehow, just now writing all this down reminds me that three is something else entirely. Forget the terrible two’s, there are the fucking three’s just around the corner…


  1. My oldest will be 3 in July and while 2 has been fairly ordinary I keep getting told how horrible 3 is so I am bracing myself. So not looking forward to having a 3yo at the same time as a 2yo?!?!?

  2. Miss A turned two and a half on Monday. We celebrated by spending the night in a lovely hotel, just the three of us. Disaster!! I am still recovering. Sigh. Bring on three.

  3. Three is coming back to you isn’t it? For me two was great. Three made me cry, regularly. Riley just turned four. I like four. And Piper just turned one. So I figure I’ve got a good couple of years before I have to face THAT again.

  4. Just sitting here sniggering as I read this post, thinking ‘has she forgotten about the eff’ing three’s’? Miss L and E are 2.5 mths shy of three and I’m already praying for the Fours! Miss L now wakes at 5.30am every morning since her opp, but has also stopped snoring and no apneoa! Catch 22 really. 🙂

  5. You ain’t seen nothing yet……wait for the teens!!

  6. Gorgeous pic of your two lovelies. Be prepared for when Daisy goes back to school – poor Harper will mourn for sister lost – AGAIN. Took us a full year for Little to get used to Big not being around. Two was cruisy for us and I giggle as I read the comments above about wait for the threes…… three sux. Big Time. And on that cheery note…..

  7. Yeah, two & a half sucks, especially when 8 months pregnant with pelvic pain. If it’s not tantrums and fake tears, it’s “I’m still hungry, I’m still hungry”, or frustration over not being able to do what he wants.

    I’m bracing myself for when baby arrives. I figure if I expect the worst, anything less will be a bonus (in terms of his behaviour , that is)

  8. Just wait for the eights!!!! Oh my Lord……! *kill me now*!!

  9. i loved the twos its the threes and even the fours that did my head it ….

  10. We got through the twos relatively unscathed. But with the words of others planted in my brain – “oh the terrible twos, but the threes are worse, especially for boys.”

    In the midst of the threes now… the tortuous threes! Some days my husband and I are TOTALLY hit of six. Mostly a wonderful kid. But oh my gosh, a few times a day… I’m ready to tender my parenting resignation!

  11. Oh man that brought back some memories. My youngest is now 5 and still plays the whinging game, only he is not pretending. The funny thing is, I actually miss it in many ways but like you said, maybe all I need is to feel that first contraction and I would be happily reminded it is behind us :)x

  12. I was just about to say – are girls different to boys? Cause for my little man 3 was HELL. Although 4 has been interesting so far too. He just can’t wait to get to school, I just keep reminding myself of that.

  13. I feel your pain! My youngest boy is smack bang in the middle of the terrible twos now and it sucks big time! The worst thing is that I have been through it with his older brother and I know the threes are as bad if not worse. I get depressed just thinking about it. Good luck for both of us!!

  14. i just blogged about the SAME THING. argh i hate tantrums so much it makes me want to throw a tantrum.

  15. Heidi Fitz says

    maybe its just a boy thing but both my boys… the 2s were gorgeous but the 4s were (and I am anticipating here …)feral!! (.. with the 3&3/4 just warming up now!!) all my ‘cluck’ for one last bubble just flies out that window! best contraception i know!

  16. You guys are all scaring me! We are just about to celebrate my daughters 3rd birthday and i’m not looking forward to having a little ‘threenager’ in the house.

  17. Oh my god Beth – I swear that seriously you tap into my head sometimes. I’m hearing you….two and half sucks.

  18. Meh! Emily has already started this and she’s 21 months. I’m consoling myself by thinking she’s advanced for her age…….

  19. uuuuuggggggggggh, having the same here at the moment. Sick. of. it! Please tell me it gets better?!

    Gorgeous photo of your girls!

  20. OH dear. 3 is so much worse I think. We are two months off turning 4 and I am hoping for a miraculous change (not likely!) xx

  21. Glad to hear the snoring has stopped. That is such a cute photo of your kiddies. I dread two to be Frank. I loved the little baby-ness stage when my son was teeny tiny and didn’t throw all my ‘spensive cushions on the floor/try to walk up stairs/require solid food (talk about Messtastic).


  22. Perhaps I’m just lucky, but I’m kinda loving two. There have been a few more tantrums, and increased stubborness (I CAN DO IT!), but I love all the conversations and the way she just joins in with what we’re doing as if she’s one of the gang. A real little person. Or perhaps I’m just not yet far enough in to ‘two’ and it’ll all come crashing down on my head soon!

  23. I miss Sandra. And Sally.

    I swear that 4 is the new two xx

  24. Oh Beth I hear you… but as others have said you clearly have forgotten how bad 3 was! Eeek! In the middle of it for my second child!

    P.S. I love that you made reference to your ‘friend’ Sandra! He he!

  25. UPDATE: My two year old just tried to flush my handbag down the toilet.
    Reality. Check!

  26. I hear you! I have a Two & a Three year old. My two year old had such a major tantrum at the RTA today that I got skipped to the head of the queue. Yes, it really was that bad. At least I was only there for a total of 15 mins. Fastest RTA trip ever.

  27. Isn’t it the f@$ken four’s?? Maybe terrible twos is a girl thing. I hated 3 1/2 to 4 1/2. HATED it!! Sending you hugs. Lots of ’em. xx

  28. Imogen is four. She started a “stage” at around six months old. I thought starting preschool may see an end to it. Now I’m convinced going to “big” school next year will stop it. Voted for you Baby.

  29. Mate. Rocco is three … a Threenager, I believe it’s called nowadays. YEAH.


  30. Love that photo….love love love!

  31. So this is what I have to look forward to in 18 months time !! Oh joy!!

    That photo is gorg ! xx

  32. As the Mother of a beautiful 3 year old …. 2 was a holiday compared to 3! I always say, the person who coined the phrase “terrible twos” their child obviously never made it to 3! I would gladly take 10 2 years olds over 1 3 year old lol

  33. 3 is pretty special BUT there is a light at the end of the tunnel. Tillie tantrums are becoming less frequent however I got a whammy of one at chatswood chase today! tillie likes to cry loudly and then do an intermittent high pitched squeal that makes everyone look then go back to crying and then comes the squeal. she kept crying and then all of a sudden started laughing at her big sister and that was the end of the tantrum over a dvd. Just like that. Preschool has made a big improvement to her behaviour BUT we still get them just not as much. It will get better I promise. She makes her face so blotchy and I just about lose it. Being in a serviced apartment means I can’t put her in the backyard so I put her on the balcony for 5 minutes and it totally freaked her out but it didn’t make her stop! hang in there, she sounds so much like tillie who has always made the other kids look like saints in our house!

  34. Yep, I feel for you lady. We are at 20 months and I swear this toddler has been in terrible two mode for the past ohhh… year! He’s an early bloomer I guess. The psychotic outbursts while playing will continue to baffle me… there are times when I don’t even question it… or stop it… or even look. It’s scary. I love that pic of your gals, beautiful xo

  35. Ha ha ha too funny. 16 & 17 year old at home, so I feel your pain, but dealing with my own, lol.

    Precious photo.

  36. I’d take your 2 or 3 anyday if you’ll take my 12 year old son. He is KILLING ME!!!! Some days it’s all I can do to walk away before I hurl my body at him & pummel him. It is so fucking hard this age!!! Harder than I thought it would ever be. The attitude, the lack of respect, the attitude, the laziness…did I mention the attitude ? Very rarely do we get glimpses of our old boy but when I see him poke his head through I cling to him ,silently pleading ” stay. Please don’t let the horrible boy take over again!” everyone tells me it’ll pass & he’ll be great but I’m not sure either one of us will survive…..

    Glad to hear the snoring has stopped ( I bet it’s such a relief ). Hopefully the sleep will follow soon. I guess her little body needs to retrain itself to have unbroken sleep after such a long time of broken sleep. Fingers crossed it happens soon xx

  37. I personally find four the worst – terrible two’s, frightful threes, f*ucking awful fours……I am quite enjoying the 6-10 age bracket however 🙂

  38. I already have the stubborn with miss 2.. can’t say i’m looking forward to the rest. x

  39. Leonardo is 18 months and it’s starting…he fights EVERYTHING I try to do…getting in the car seat, getting out of the car seat…the high chair, the bath, his nappies…even eating his food, which he loves, but feels compelled to make it difficult just because he can. My gosh…anyway, my mum says they come good around the age of thirty!

  40. I’m 38 and do everything on your list. Only 36 years to go!

  41. My bubba is 20 months and we are now getting sneak peaks into the World of Two. I feel like closing the door.

  42. just wait ’til the teens hahah xxx

    bet you so lurve hearing that 😉

  43. I was having a bit of chuckle as I read this and can relate to all of it. My number 2 little girl seemed to be more fiesty and determined than number one. She’s 3 and a half now and that is no picnic! Secretly love the determination though. Cheers, Mez

  44. my mum always said to me, “hayley quit the whinging!” Now I get it. Now I also get the karma. I have this with both of my little people right now, and oh it does my head in. Taj has started a high pitched whinge. It is like he is hitting puberty with his squealing like a girl in a boy’s body. He is 3. Not sure if that makes you feel better! Maybe it will as we all sing together in our whinging chorus. A song for all the mummas that just want to whinge and stamp their feet too! rock your weekend lovely x

  45. I’ll trade…. an almost 12yr old girl & a 14 yr old boy. Tantrums and hormones. It’s fantastic. Feel free to join me over in the corner where I’m quietly rocking back and forward!

  46. Miss T was an absolute horror at that age. I dressed her in overalls so that when she threw herself on the floor in public, I could just ‘grab the handles’ & carry her away like luggage (epic Mum fail?). Karma’s a bitch though… she has 2 1/2 yr old twins & the big one is turning 4 this month! Bahahahaha

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