Birthday Bideo Blog

So, this morning I woke up and I was a whole year older. 34. I think that’s middle aged. I don’t feel middle aged but somehow I think I’m starting to look it. And I have these kids that make me look a little middle aged. And a car that looks a little middle aged. And a fancy house – now that’s definitely middle aged. But I’m OK with it. All of it. I am feeling very loved today with special breakfasts cooked, showers uninterrupted and makeup on and hair done and coffees made, messages up the wahzoo and mornings teas with cakes AND candles and everything.

I made a little message with the girls because they wanted to. I felt like I was looking good this morning, and then I looked at this. I have no top lip, I have a double chin, I am looking puffy and overweight and well every one of my 34 years. BUT…instead of focusing on all that stuff I am going to accept it, because, like now when I look at pictures of me 10 years ago when I thought at the time I looked like a fat mole when in fact I was taut and fresh faced (dewy even!) someday I will look back and think, “I was looking pretty good at 34.” Because that’s what birthdays do isn’t it? They make you stop and look back at the year that was and think about how far you’ve come and take stock of where you are right now. And it’s been a big year. A big move, a new beginning for all of us. And well, right now, no top lip and pointy nose and all, things are pretty bloody fabulous.

It is indeed a Happy Birthday!

Don’t you love how you want your kids to do or say something nice and they say “blargh bluergh BLAHHHHHHHHH”. And then the little one copies everything the bigger one does? Delightful.

Oh and also, it’s been 34 years since Elvis died today – may the King rest in peace. You know he died the day I was born? I think our spirits collided on the way up/down. That, or a serious love of bacon and pork products was passed to me. And that’s alright by me too…thankyouverymuch.


  1. Happy birthday gorgeous lady!

  2. cookcleanstudy says

    Happy birthday. Glad you’re having a good day.

  3. Is it wrong that the BLEURGH BLEURGHS annoyed the crap out of me? I love your girls – delightful – but I am in my own trenches up here man. Am easily triggered.

    Hey, did Rob give you some magic chocolate thing from France for your birthday last year? That means I’ve been reading your blog for a year, Elvis.

    You bloody rock – swig back some champers for me. (If you do, you know that’s a loooooot of champers, right?)

    Love ya guts XOXOXOX

  4. Happy Birthday Funny Lady!!! Hope the whole thing is as fabulous as the beginning sounded!

  5. happy happy happy happy b’day lovely lady!!
    may your year ahead be absolutely fabulous!!
    cheryl xox.

  6. Happy Birthday! I love those bowls you received – just gorgeous! Enjoy your day πŸ™‚

  7. Happy Birthday Beth!

    And I hope that Elvis didn’t pass onto you his love for deep fried peanut butter and jelly sandwiches.

    Celebrate that you will never be as young tomorrow as you are today.

    Much love!


  8. Wishing you a wonderful day and a year full of happiness and joy xx

  9. Just do what I do and tell people you’re 44 and then they say ‘Oh my God! You look sooo good for your age!’

    I must say in all honesty you look pretty damn fabulous and I would know because at the moment I’m as bloated as Elvis was 34 years ago.

    Hope you continue to have fab day lady. Been thinking of you. xxxoooxxx

  10. Happy Blah blah blah birthday! πŸ™‚
    Oh and those bowls…D.I.V.I.N.E!!

  11. Here’s to the next 34 years. Wishing you lots of laughs, lots of love and of course, lots of wine! Happy Birthday x

  12. What are you talking about? You look gorgeous!
    Daisy is a little mini-Beth, and I love how Harper is the little copy-cat. Such a sweet video.
    Glad you have had a fab birthday so far… hope the rest is just as fantastic! xxx

  13. happy birthday miss beth!!!

    your girls are just divine. not dissimilar to my own 5 and 21 mth girlies… parrots who drive me batty with their copying of each others most annoying habits. Why does it seem so much cuter on someone elses children!!!?!?!

  14. Happy Birthday..I thought 35 was middle aged, ‘cos isn’t our allotted time 3 score years and ten..70? Thirty five is the middle of in my books you’re not middle aged til next year…so chin up you young thing!

  15. Mate, wait till you hit 40! I’m 42 now and have never felt younger – you get your groove on in your 40’s and really don’t give a frogs fat arse what anyone thinks – you know? Happy Birthday cyber friend xxx

  16. Happy, Happy, Happy Birthday!! πŸ™‚

  17. Happy Birthday Beth! Welcome to 34!!

  18. Happy Birthday. Your girls are so funny. I hope you had a good day. xxx

  19. Happy happy birthday fellow Leo! Hope your day was fabulous. You are becoming a vlogging god – love it!!!

  20. Truth be told I normally skim read your posts, which today has certainly caused me no end of stress.

    Your “messages up the wahzoo” read on skim as “massages up the wahzoo”.

    Please make it go away…

    Mr Anonymous

  21. Redundant Mother says

    Happy Birthday lovely. You look bloody fab! Hope you’re having a gorgeous night xx

  22. Happy Birthday Beth – hope you’re still enjoying a fabulous day. Love that bowl! And 34 is good – five months into it and I’d say my best year in my 30’s to date! xx

  23. Happy Birthday Beth! I think you look younger than 34!

  24. Glad to see you are having a great birthday! I love the bowls too. I remember the day you were born. Well, I didn’t know you were born but I was in grade 5 and we were on a family holiday in San Francisco. I didn’t really get who Elvis was but I knew it was a big deal.Happy Birthday!, your girls are gorgeous.

  25. Happy Birthday lovely!… I would say, definitely NOT middle aged, that’s not until next year : )

    Seriously, what is it with 4 year olds and Silly?, I don’t remember ever being so silly, the kids of today!?!?

    Hope that you had a great day! xox

  26. That was adorable!
    Happy happy special day.

  27. Well Happy Birthday Beth! It was my 34th on the 5th so we are very close together and I think we both look fabulous for our age! Enjoy enjoy!

  28. Can you just stop it with the middle aged thing! I thought middle aged was 40 something?! No??
    You’re looking damn fine 34 year old Beth. I could eat Harper on toast, she is delicious :o)
    Happy Birthday (again) and love that you still mention your connection to Elvis… it’s what I think about when your birthday is mentioned too! xo

  29. HAPPY BIRTHDAY! and enjoy some bacon for Elvis, he would just love that.
    ps you look smoking hot at 34. Your hubs is one lucky porkchop.

  30. That was funny as LOL.

    Happy Birthday xx

  31. Happy (belated) birthday! And thanks for that hilarious video!


  32. Hope you had a lovely birthday..

    I am soo in love with those watermeleon bowls – Lucky you..

    Sarah from Canberra.

  33. Happy Birthday Beth.

    May the coming year be spectacular for you and yours.


  34. Sparked by your coincidental collision with Elvis…. and in lieu of a sparkling packaged gift, I would like sing a little tune to celebrate this fabulous day Lovely….

    “Well, it’s one for the money, [uhu]
    Two for the show,
    Three to get ready,
    Now go, cat, go.

    But don’t you step on my blue suede shoes.
    You can do anything but lay off of my blue suede shoes.

    Well, you can knock me down,
    Step in my face,
    Slander my name
    All over the place.

    Do anything that you want to do, but uh-uh,
    Honey, lay off of my shoes
    Don’t you step on my blue suede shoes.
    You can do anything but lay off of my blue suede shoes.

    Well, it’s one for the money,
    Two for the show,
    Three to get ready,
    Now go, cat, go.

    But don’t you step on my blue suede shoes.
    You can do anything but lay off of my blue suede shoes.”
    I hope you pop him into the ipod, turn the volume to loudest and dance around the living room with the girls today!

    Happy Birthday Beth xx

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