Each and every Mothers Day my brother and his wife host a magnificent lunch for us. Some time, years ago, it started and I can’t imagine it not happening every year (sorry guys!). Whether it was 2008, 2009, the food is always amazing, the good wine flowing and the table long and filled with some special people. Family. It’s just how I like to spend my day. My Mothers Day.
I got some great presents from Rob and the girls – some FABULOUSO red leather gloves (cashmere lined nonetheless) as well as a dust buster that I may or may not have purchased for myself. It’s OK, I’m not sure who I am these days either. I got a Cath Kidson mug from my Mum and some beautiful little bits and pieces from all the other mothers who were there too – it’s a funny little tradition for all the Mum’s to buy for all the other Mum’s – something small like chocolates, or cream, or a candle, or some pantyhose. I went home with quite the goody bag!
It was a great day but it ended in typical style. An over tired 4 year old who told me that she “didn’t love me anymore”. Endless fights about whether she would hop in the bath, or not, or get undressed or not. Eat dinner or not. And while I know it’s always like this at the end of a loooooong day I didn’t cope particularly well and lost it. Again. I even slammed a bathroom door on her and jammed her fingers in the process. Yep. Seriously, when will I figure this shit out? I was reminded, again, what being a mother truly is. It’s endless patience. And love. And teaching. And helping them work stuff out. And just being there. Being the grown up. And not about how it makes me feel. How it frustrates me. How it makes me boil with rage inside just because it doesn’t make sense to me.
When I finally put her to bed after almost 2 hours of drama, and I looked down at those tired eyes, cheeks tear stained and eyes puffy, my heart broke into a million pieces yet again. And I promised myself that tomorrow I will try and be a better mother. Do better for her. Do better for Harper. And Rob. And mostly for myself.
It’s a tough gig this mothering business. Happy {belated} Mothers Day to you.
Hell to the yeah. Tough, tough, tough.
That Mother’s Day lunch looks divine. Can I come next year please?
Happy Mothers Day to you!… as an abridge to my mothers day post; my two older kids went to bed with no story and floods of tears after I told them both off, sigh, but that is all part-and-part of being a mum. Tomorrow’s a new day!
Oh – the (accidentally hurt)fingers will heal, quicker then your emotional scar probably.
I hate being consumed by that awful guilt that ensues after a good and proper Mummy meltdown.
Tomrrow’s a new day.
And they’re usually a little bit less defiant the day apres meltdown too!
π
Your mothers day sounds lovely- and what a gorgeous idea for all the mums to give each other something. So much nicer that what mums normally give each other…
In the middle of the night last night I told my unwell cherub that she had to go to sleep because I was sick of her. Yes I was tired after holding her from midnight til after 3am, but I don’t remember ever seeing that on a huggies ad… Needless to say I’ve spent today sucking up to her.
Yet another post of delicious food! Can I be part of your family?
Poor Daisy (& you!) hope she was in better spirits after a good sleep.
go easy on yourself, Beth.
Bali will be just the respite you need :)x
Happy Mother’s Day to you!
Mine ended with me having a crack-a-thon which I’m still a bit ashamed of π
Enjoy your holiday, and I hope you get to do everything your “we’re going on holidays” post said you were going to do π
When I am on Facebook, it is always suggesting you to me. I think it’s great, but I’m not sure why it’s doing it as we don’t have mutual friends???
I think it means you should be my real life friend because you are amazing!!!!
Oh, Beth. I hear you. And ouch! I still remember accidentally shutting Joshua’s tiny fingers with the car door one day – that kind of memory doesn’t leave us mums, does it? It is a tough gig, this mothering thing. But your girls are so lucky to have you as their Mum. J x
Oh shit, I’ve been feeling guilty guilty guilty lately. All of us so sick and cranky in these parts. It’s so hard keeping the juggle going lady, you’re doing fine :o)
Mother’s Day looked fantabulous, lovely photos.
don’t worry, keira did that ‘i don’t love you anymore mummy’ once when I wasn’t buying something for her and I nearly cried. Then to make it worse a well meaning mother told me she was shocked as none of her 4 children have ever said that to her. Um, not helping things! It is hard but you’ll remember it and tell her when she’s older!